tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1588509537601105804.post8975539015712382598..comments2024-01-26T08:04:08.517-05:00Comments on The Public Query Slushpile: Query: FOCUS, SAM (Revision 2)Rick Daleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05173516899130463413noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1588509537601105804.post-18073702372749437612010-04-25T16:08:23.965-04:002010-04-25T16:08:23.965-04:00Many thanks for that Suzan! Great to hear those wo...Many thanks for that Suzan! Great to hear those words, 'ready to go' :-)Rohit Gorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08501512706381161603noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1588509537601105804.post-45332287968996544632010-04-25T14:44:13.530-04:002010-04-25T14:44:13.530-04:00Just three small things:
1) Go with your hook as ...Just three small things:<br /><br />1) Go with your hook as your opening paragraph. It's much stronger. If you feel the need to say how you found the agent, be specfic (i.e. agent's website, interview, etc.) and add it to the end of the query. Remember the book's the product you're selling in a query.<br /><br />2) Leave out the "I hope you like . . ." sentence. It doesn't project confidence in your abilities as a writer.<br /><br />2) Take out the "Would you like to see. . ." sentence. Again, it's the projection of confidence.<br /><br />Other than those little things, I think you're ready to go!<br /><br />Best wishes on your submissions, Rohit. Let us know what happens.Suzan Hardenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04600258874634909988noreply@blogger.com