Jan 24, 2011

QUERY: Nephilim Wars: The Formation of the Human Alliance (First Revision)

Click here to read the original query.

Thanks for all the input! I focused much more on the characters and their actions this time.


Dear [Agent],

The enemy that created him has cursed the powerful wizard, Master Tigon, with long life. This power has allowed him to watch civilizations rise and fall. Now it’s humanities turn.

Determined not to let this happen he travels to Atala, an ancient castle and home to the mighty Centaurs. There he finds Deminar, warrior prince and last hope of the world. Together the old wizard, the hero prince of Atala, and two Royal guards embark on a journey through an ancient portal to a foreign land. They travel to present day Earth.

After going above and beyond the call of duty to rescue the president, Captain Nolan Fields of the US Marine Corps is given a new company to command, Alpha Company First Recon Division, the best of the best. This company of Marines will join the knights on their journey and will be the first envoys to a new world. They will be part of the Earth’s First Contact with an alien civilization.

But, First Contact is a disaster. The team of marines is ambushed, some of them captured. Now Captain Fields and Prince Deminar must battle against two technologically advanced races; the unstoppable horde of the space-dwelling Nephilim and the Nano-machine powered Neila. But to save this planet these two soldiers from different worlds must unite humanity, for if they fail Earth will be next.

Nephilim Wars: The Formation of the Human Alliance is a complete Science Fiction / Epic Fantasy Novel at 140,000 words, with a complete blend of swords, sorcery, castle sieges, space battles, and modern warfare. This is my first attempt at publication.

Thank you for your time and consideration,

QUERY: Nephilim Wars: The Formation of the Human Alliance

Dear [Agent],

An ancient Wizard has a vision, of war and death. A titanic clash between Centaur Steel and Nephilim shield swords. High above the planet space ships clash, the wounded and dead falling back to the surface in flames. But there is more to this war than the knights of Aztlan and the gray Nephilim aliens. The shape shifting monsters of Neila attack the flanks of the armies, while soldiers and tanks bearing the flags of our world lead the charge. Under the heels of these four armies run crimson rivers of blood and the tears of survival.

Now the wizard must unite two human worlds together to stand against a powerful alien foe.
The world's only hope of survival are the seven Pantheons of Light and Destruction, ancient temples long forgotten in the sands of time. United together they hold unlimited power, but the Nephilim have a head start, all that stands between them and victory is a US Marine Captain and a Warrior Prince.

Humanity faces destruction. Out gunned and out manned its fate seems sealed, but humanity has one advantage. It excels at war.

Nephilim Wars: The Formation of the Human Alliance is a complete Science Fiction / Epic Fantasy Novel at 140,000 words, with a complete blend of swords, sorcery, castle sieges, space battles, and modern warfare. This is my first attempt at publication.

Thank you for your time and consideration,