Dear Agent:
They both needed a way to start over again and get it right this time.
Twenty years have passed since Gail first saw Tony Cimino behind the counter of his father's pizza shop. The first time was a chance encounter she is certain he would not remember. She doesn't know yet that he is her second chance at happiness and tries to push him out of her life. But Tony, a man who knows what he wants and sees it in Gail, is not going to give up so easily.
Second Hand News is about family, the invisible older sister, the vain, status conscience mother and "pretty" younger sister; a story of fun, friendships and final vindication, woven with the antics of a feisty, hilarious Bubbie; the mortar between the bricks. Add Gail's supporting characters; the young Dominican girl who befriends her, the gun-toting ex-vet who helps her, her out of bounds girlfriends, hot dates and two people falling in love.
Chaos rules, as Bubbie escapes from assisted living, moves into her granddaughter's small apartment, and entertains the neighbors singing Ethel Merman tunes late at night in the elevator. Gail fends off dates arranged by her mother and sister, squashes a Yuppie co-op conversion, and uses her wit and talent to find a new career.
Second Hand News, complete at 80,000 words, romantic women's fiction, explores how two people find a better way to live.
I found your name (Insert pertinent agent information) I would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Respectfully,
===================================
CHAPTER ONE
Three of us sat on a cold, wooden bench in the judge's chamber and waited. It was a long day and seven others had already finished and been escorted to the next room to sign papers and get a receipt, pending the official document.
When it was my turn, I stood to answer three questions: 1) Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, 2) Do you Gail Goldblum Silverstein wish to contest this action, and 3) Do you wish to return to your maiden name?
Nothing came out of my mouth and the girl next to me pulled the edge of my jacket and snapped, "Say something, and let's get the hell out of here."
I gulped, answered each question, and it was done.
We were alone in the room with the judge and his bailiff, who pointed, "This way, miss."
I was officially an ex-wife.
Showing posts with label Women's Fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Women's Fiction. Show all posts
Jan 17, 2011
Oct 11, 2010
Query - All Because of You (First Revision)
Click here to read the original query.
Forced to kill for sport until the age of sixteen, Adelaide Banvard has been kept at the side of Christian Wren, one of the most powerful men in Los Angeles and the man who saved her life. For ten years she’s obeyed his every command and whim, the schizophrenic monster in her head enjoying every moment of pain and every drop of blood on her hands. But Adelaide finally has the chance to escape this life of violence. Her opportunity comes in the form of ATF Agent Marcus Grant, a man whose assignment is to apprehend Wren, the suspected leader behind one of the largest gun-running operations California has ever seen. Adelaide’s loyalties are tested at every turn as she fights her way out of Wren’s organization, the power Wren holds over her and the attraction she hides for the undercover ATF agent who wants her behind bars for murder.
ALL BECAUSE OF YOU is an 85,000 word contemporary and suspenseful women’s fiction novel. I am an active member in the Las Vegas Romance Writer’s chapter of Romance Writer’s of America and have a degree from Utah Valley University in the field of Psychology. I have accurate knowledge on the subject of schizophrenia and would be glad to send you my complete manuscript for your review. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Sincerely,
Me
Forced to kill for sport until the age of sixteen, Adelaide Banvard has been kept at the side of Christian Wren, one of the most powerful men in Los Angeles and the man who saved her life. For ten years she’s obeyed his every command and whim, the schizophrenic monster in her head enjoying every moment of pain and every drop of blood on her hands. But Adelaide finally has the chance to escape this life of violence. Her opportunity comes in the form of ATF Agent Marcus Grant, a man whose assignment is to apprehend Wren, the suspected leader behind one of the largest gun-running operations California has ever seen. Adelaide’s loyalties are tested at every turn as she fights her way out of Wren’s organization, the power Wren holds over her and the attraction she hides for the undercover ATF agent who wants her behind bars for murder.
ALL BECAUSE OF YOU is an 85,000 word contemporary and suspenseful women’s fiction novel. I am an active member in the Las Vegas Romance Writer’s chapter of Romance Writer’s of America and have a degree from Utah Valley University in the field of Psychology. I have accurate knowledge on the subject of schizophrenia and would be glad to send you my complete manuscript for your review. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Sincerely,
Me
Oct 10, 2010
Query - All Because of You
Dear [Agent name],
I am writing to you because I believe my 85,000-word contemporary suspenseful women’s fiction novel, ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, would be appropriate for your agency.
Kidnapped at the age of seven, Adelaide Banvard has been forced to kill her entire life. She’s kept at the side of Christian Wren, one of the most powerful men in Los Angeles, but after ten years, finally has a chance to escape. Her opportunity comes in the form of ATF Agent Marcus Grant, a man whose assignment is to apprehend the leader behind one of the largest local gun running operations California has ever seen. His loyalties are tested at every turn as he fights his way through Wren’s organization and his second-in-command. But Adelaide isn’t everything she seems. Her schizophrenic mind, superb combat skills and exquisite beauty fascinate Marcus beyond control, leading his investigation into hot water and into Adelaide’s own little world.
Thank you for your time and consideration...blah blah blah.
Sincerely,
Me
I am writing to you because I believe my 85,000-word contemporary suspenseful women’s fiction novel, ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, would be appropriate for your agency.
Kidnapped at the age of seven, Adelaide Banvard has been forced to kill her entire life. She’s kept at the side of Christian Wren, one of the most powerful men in Los Angeles, but after ten years, finally has a chance to escape. Her opportunity comes in the form of ATF Agent Marcus Grant, a man whose assignment is to apprehend the leader behind one of the largest local gun running operations California has ever seen. His loyalties are tested at every turn as he fights his way through Wren’s organization and his second-in-command. But Adelaide isn’t everything she seems. Her schizophrenic mind, superb combat skills and exquisite beauty fascinate Marcus beyond control, leading his investigation into hot water and into Adelaide’s own little world.
Thank you for your time and consideration...blah blah blah.
Sincerely,
Me
Oct 8, 2010
Query- Second Hand News (revised)
Click here to read the original query.
As promised, I am back.
Dear Agent:
Second Hand News, my 80,000 word humorous women's fiction is about new beginnings.
When Gail Goldblum's arranged marriage fails, she moves into grandma Bubbie's two-room apartment in the Washington Heights neighborhood of Manhattan, one floor below her parents and loses herself in romance novels and the dream of happily-ever-after.
Gail's family immediately begins the search for her next husband, while she reunites with several old schoolmates, has wild sex with two Princeton "boys," joins a romance book club, washes out of a pottery class and uses her wit and talent to find a new career.
As a teenager, Tony Cimino worked part-time for his father. The youngest of eight children, he still works for his father, but refuses to give up the dream of having his own landscape business. Twenty years have passed when Gail walks up to the counter for a slice of pizza and sees him. Tony, the cute boy from her childhood has grown into a handsome, kindhearted man.
Chaos rules, as Bubbie escapes from assisted living, moves into her granddaughter's small apartment, and entertains the neighbors singing Ethel Merman tunes late at night in the elevator. Gail fends off a Yuppie co-op conversion and Tony tries to capture Gail's attention even as he realizes the dream of opening his own business.
The first time Gail knew she loved Tony, she was in the fourth grade, he was in the eighth. Each time they meet, she tries to deny her feelings and walk away. Tony is a man who knows what he wants, but Gail not being able to trust again, pushes the one person she wants out of her life.
I found your name on Chuck Sambuchino's Blog; A Guide To Literary Agents, read your blog daily, and I believe my work meets your criteria. I would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Respectfully,
====
Opening lines:
No matter how a girl gets down the aisle, being married and then divorced is preferable to dragging one's miserable carcass through life as an old maid.
Three of us sit on a cold, wooden bench in the judge's chamber and wait. It's a long day and seven others have already finished and been escorted to the next room to sign papers and get a receipt, pending the official documents.
When it is my turn, I stand to answer three questions: 1) Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, 2) Do you Gail Goldblum Silverstein wish to contest this action, and 3) Do you wish to return to your maiden name?
Nothing comes out of my mouth and the girl next to me pulls the edge of my jacket and snaps, "Say yes, or I do, and let's get the hell out of here."
I gulp, "I do," three times and it is done.
I wait for a cheer from the audience, but alas we are alone in the room with the judge and his bailiff, who points, "This way, miss."
I am officially an ex-wife.
As promised, I am back.
Dear Agent:
Second Hand News, my 80,000 word humorous women's fiction is about new beginnings.
When Gail Goldblum's arranged marriage fails, she moves into grandma Bubbie's two-room apartment in the Washington Heights neighborhood of Manhattan, one floor below her parents and loses herself in romance novels and the dream of happily-ever-after.
Gail's family immediately begins the search for her next husband, while she reunites with several old schoolmates, has wild sex with two Princeton "boys," joins a romance book club, washes out of a pottery class and uses her wit and talent to find a new career.
As a teenager, Tony Cimino worked part-time for his father. The youngest of eight children, he still works for his father, but refuses to give up the dream of having his own landscape business. Twenty years have passed when Gail walks up to the counter for a slice of pizza and sees him. Tony, the cute boy from her childhood has grown into a handsome, kindhearted man.
Chaos rules, as Bubbie escapes from assisted living, moves into her granddaughter's small apartment, and entertains the neighbors singing Ethel Merman tunes late at night in the elevator. Gail fends off a Yuppie co-op conversion and Tony tries to capture Gail's attention even as he realizes the dream of opening his own business.
The first time Gail knew she loved Tony, she was in the fourth grade, he was in the eighth. Each time they meet, she tries to deny her feelings and walk away. Tony is a man who knows what he wants, but Gail not being able to trust again, pushes the one person she wants out of her life.
I found your name on Chuck Sambuchino's Blog; A Guide To Literary Agents, read your blog daily, and I believe my work meets your criteria. I would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Respectfully,
====
Opening lines:
No matter how a girl gets down the aisle, being married and then divorced is preferable to dragging one's miserable carcass through life as an old maid.
Three of us sit on a cold, wooden bench in the judge's chamber and wait. It's a long day and seven others have already finished and been escorted to the next room to sign papers and get a receipt, pending the official documents.
When it is my turn, I stand to answer three questions: 1) Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, 2) Do you Gail Goldblum Silverstein wish to contest this action, and 3) Do you wish to return to your maiden name?
Nothing comes out of my mouth and the girl next to me pulls the edge of my jacket and snaps, "Say yes, or I do, and let's get the hell out of here."
I gulp, "I do," three times and it is done.
I wait for a cheer from the audience, but alas we are alone in the room with the judge and his bailiff, who points, "This way, miss."
I am officially an ex-wife.
Sep 18, 2010
QUERY- REMEMBERING YOU women's fiction
Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Click here to read the third revision.
Dear Agent,
“Genna” Genovase is smart, beautiful, driven and about to break the glass ceiling at the swanky country club in Delaware where she works. Taking her long awaited three-week vacation before she begins as “Director of the Kitchens”, Genna decides to surprise her family by driving up to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual 4th of July Parade.
However, the surprise is on her when she runs into her ex-fiancé at her uncle’s diner. Tony makes it clear he wants her back and Genna wonders if she can forgive him for breaking her heart a decade ago.
Things get complicated though, when little Petie DiCampo shows up at the diner one morning, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy. He sets his sights and his heart on Genna but Tony isn’t giving up that easily.
Genna also finds her aunt may be in the beginning stages of Alzheimer’s. The family is in denial; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down and her beloved uncle, dealing with all the stress, has a heart attack.
Genna steps in to keep the diner open and the family together while he recuperates and she questions what’s more important – breaking that glass ceiling or her family.
When her uncle reassures her the family and the diner will be fine without her, she heads back to Delaware. Unfortunately, she leaves her heart behind in Rhode Island and wonders what it will take to get it back.
REMEMBERING YOU is a complete work of women's fiction at 87,000 words.
etc. etc.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Click here to read the third revision.
Dear Agent,
“Genna” Genovase is smart, beautiful, driven and about to break the glass ceiling at the swanky country club in Delaware where she works. Taking her long awaited three-week vacation before she begins as “Director of the Kitchens”, Genna decides to surprise her family by driving up to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual 4th of July Parade.
However, the surprise is on her when she runs into her ex-fiancé at her uncle’s diner. Tony makes it clear he wants her back and Genna wonders if she can forgive him for breaking her heart a decade ago.
Things get complicated though, when little Petie DiCampo shows up at the diner one morning, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy. He sets his sights and his heart on Genna but Tony isn’t giving up that easily.
Genna also finds her aunt may be in the beginning stages of Alzheimer’s. The family is in denial; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down and her beloved uncle, dealing with all the stress, has a heart attack.
Genna steps in to keep the diner open and the family together while he recuperates and she questions what’s more important – breaking that glass ceiling or her family.
When her uncle reassures her the family and the diner will be fine without her, she heads back to Delaware. Unfortunately, she leaves her heart behind in Rhode Island and wonders what it will take to get it back.
REMEMBERING YOU is a complete work of women's fiction at 87,000 words.
etc. etc.
Aug 24, 2010
Query- The Tale of Lizzie Brogan and The Moon Goddess
In each query the paragraph about how I found the agent changed. They are all done individually. I have not yet sent this to anyone.
Dear _____________:
Lizzie, the over indulged baby of the Brogan clan, lives a life of privilege until the morning of her thirtieth birthday, when her older brother delivers her to a Brooklyn basement apartment she calls her cave dwelling. Concerned Lizzie will remain the baby of the family, he employs a formula of tough love and hard work to help her grow up.
For the first month, she believes all she must face in her new life is the responsibility and collective confusion of five little row houses. Not quite. Soon, Lizzie meets the ghost of her Aunt Annie May, a bawdy, talented Broadway performer, whose portal to this life is a tramp steamer and an old wooden trunk from the Belasco theatre.
During the next two years, while Lizzie discovers the secrets of the five houses, she also learns she is a direct descendent of The Moon Goddess, the Celtic Goddess of Love. By the summer soltice, using the book of sacred scribes, she must remove a curse, reverse each disaster that has plagued her and help clear the way for the true magic of love.
The Tale of Lizzie Brogan and The Moon Goddess, completed at 85,000 words, is humorous, women's fiction about a late bloomer who finally grows up with a little help from a ghost.
My eighteen-year career in community development and children's not-for-profit, has provided me numerous opportunities to hone my written and verbal skills. I am a comfortable public speaker, possessed the marketing skills necessary to gain valuable funding for our youth, and can create a network of support for my stories.
I found your name the first time on Chuck Sambuchino's Blog; A Guide To Literary Agents, read your blog every day, and I believe my work meets your criteria. I would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript. Thank you for your consideration and time.
Respectively,
Florence Fois (a/k/a Cronin)
My blog: http://ramblingsfromtheleft.wordpress.com.
e-mail: florencefois@aol.com
The Tale of Lizzie Brogan and the Moon Goddess By: Florence Fois
The late bloomer ...
"The term is used metaphorically to describe a child or adolescent who develops more slowly than others in their age group, but eventually catches up and in some cases overtakes their peers, or an adult whose talent or genius in a particular field only appears later in life than is normal – in some cases only in old age."
Paraphrased from an Internet Encyclopedia
CHAPTER
My name is Lizzie and I live in a cave in Brooklyn. No, not like the Indian caves inside the cliffs which rise above the Hudson River. This is what my brother Timothy calls a modern boutique single, real estate jargon for a Brooklyn cave dwelling, known as a basement apartment rising above the concrete foundation of a row house.
Until the lovely May morning of my thirtieth birthday, my life was one of leisure and discovery, a series of adventures, the tastes and sounds of traversing the globe and each birthday, a magnificent event with a deluge of presents befitting the "baby" of the family.
Dear _____________:
Lizzie, the over indulged baby of the Brogan clan, lives a life of privilege until the morning of her thirtieth birthday, when her older brother delivers her to a Brooklyn basement apartment she calls her cave dwelling. Concerned Lizzie will remain the baby of the family, he employs a formula of tough love and hard work to help her grow up.
For the first month, she believes all she must face in her new life is the responsibility and collective confusion of five little row houses. Not quite. Soon, Lizzie meets the ghost of her Aunt Annie May, a bawdy, talented Broadway performer, whose portal to this life is a tramp steamer and an old wooden trunk from the Belasco theatre.
During the next two years, while Lizzie discovers the secrets of the five houses, she also learns she is a direct descendent of The Moon Goddess, the Celtic Goddess of Love. By the summer soltice, using the book of sacred scribes, she must remove a curse, reverse each disaster that has plagued her and help clear the way for the true magic of love.
The Tale of Lizzie Brogan and The Moon Goddess, completed at 85,000 words, is humorous, women's fiction about a late bloomer who finally grows up with a little help from a ghost.
My eighteen-year career in community development and children's not-for-profit, has provided me numerous opportunities to hone my written and verbal skills. I am a comfortable public speaker, possessed the marketing skills necessary to gain valuable funding for our youth, and can create a network of support for my stories.
I found your name the first time on Chuck Sambuchino's Blog; A Guide To Literary Agents, read your blog every day, and I believe my work meets your criteria. I would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript. Thank you for your consideration and time.
Respectively,
Florence Fois (a/k/a Cronin)
My blog: http://ramblingsfromtheleft.wordpress.com.
e-mail: florencefois@aol.com
The Tale of Lizzie Brogan and the Moon Goddess By: Florence Fois
The late bloomer ...
"The term is used metaphorically to describe a child or adolescent who develops more slowly than others in their age group, but eventually catches up and in some cases overtakes their peers, or an adult whose talent or genius in a particular field only appears later in life than is normal – in some cases only in old age."
Paraphrased from an Internet Encyclopedia
CHAPTER
My name is Lizzie and I live in a cave in Brooklyn. No, not like the Indian caves inside the cliffs which rise above the Hudson River. This is what my brother Timothy calls a modern boutique single, real estate jargon for a Brooklyn cave dwelling, known as a basement apartment rising above the concrete foundation of a row house.
Until the lovely May morning of my thirtieth birthday, my life was one of leisure and discovery, a series of adventures, the tastes and sounds of traversing the globe and each birthday, a magnificent event with a deluge of presents befitting the "baby" of the family.
Aug 22, 2010
Query- Eiffel Flower (first revision)
Click here to read the original query.
Dear Agent,
Sorority girl Rose Jastone lives a meticulously planned life. She is the lively social chair of Delta Delta Gamma, a model student, and punk rock enthusiast who can throw on a pair of Chuck's when occasioned. Trying to avoid the responsiblity of planning her post-graduate future, however, she signs up for a care-free spring semester at the University of Paris, Panthénon-Sorbonne.
Paris turns out to be more than Rose's Philosophy major logic bargained for. Stuck dorming with Noemi Brousarre, a celebutante roommate with a few fifth-life crises of her own, Rose is thrown into a world of Parisian drama that makes sorority life seem like a stroll though le Jardin des Tuileries.
Rose finds herself responsible for planning the renowned Crillon Ball and reuniting Noemi with her estranged sister Sonia. She also has to juggle a crack-pot study group and mixed feelings for an enigmatic figure skater. Left mediating the problems of the city around her, Rose wonders if she'll ever bloom into the “Eiffel Flower” Noemi promised, or if she will be stuck following the life-plan her parents and friends have already constructed for her.
Eiffel Flower is a women's fiction novel, complete at 92,000 words. Based on your interview with the blog "Mother.Write.", I felt like my manuscript may be a good fit for your agency. Thank you for taking the time to consider my query.
Sincerely,
Author
Dear Agent,
Sorority girl Rose Jastone lives a meticulously planned life. She is the lively social chair of Delta Delta Gamma, a model student, and punk rock enthusiast who can throw on a pair of Chuck's when occasioned. Trying to avoid the responsiblity of planning her post-graduate future, however, she signs up for a care-free spring semester at the University of Paris, Panthénon-Sorbonne.
Paris turns out to be more than Rose's Philosophy major logic bargained for. Stuck dorming with Noemi Brousarre, a celebutante roommate with a few fifth-life crises of her own, Rose is thrown into a world of Parisian drama that makes sorority life seem like a stroll though le Jardin des Tuileries.
Rose finds herself responsible for planning the renowned Crillon Ball and reuniting Noemi with her estranged sister Sonia. She also has to juggle a crack-pot study group and mixed feelings for an enigmatic figure skater. Left mediating the problems of the city around her, Rose wonders if she'll ever bloom into the “Eiffel Flower” Noemi promised, or if she will be stuck following the life-plan her parents and friends have already constructed for her.
Eiffel Flower is a women's fiction novel, complete at 92,000 words. Based on your interview with the blog "Mother.Write.", I felt like my manuscript may be a good fit for your agency. Thank you for taking the time to consider my query.
Sincerely,
Author
Aug 5, 2010
Query- Emma's Heaven, Contemporary Women's Fiction (revised)
Click here to read the original query.
Thanks for everyone's help.
There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. When she does, no one believes her.
After her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of a few moments, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? The child was never Emma. Her husband, counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional.
However, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter: Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she manages to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and motherly instinct, Megan questions whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Thanks for everyone's help.
There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. When she does, no one believes her.
After her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of a few moments, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? The child was never Emma. Her husband, counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional.
However, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter: Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she manages to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and motherly instinct, Megan questions whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Aug 4, 2010
REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction third revison (and hopefully the last?)
Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion (a goal she’s been working toward all her life) as executive kitchen manager of a swanky Delaware country club. She isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she sees Tony, her ex-fiancé, at her uncle’s diner. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Problems escalate as Genna discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down, and in the midst of all this, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it has always been in her blood and she questions if she should give up her fantastic new job offer to stay in Bristol and take care of her family and the diner.
Tony is also pushing her to stay but when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally get her over Tony. But Tony isn’t giving up that easily.
Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she goes back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is; which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion (a goal she’s been working toward all her life) as executive kitchen manager of a swanky Delaware country club. She isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she sees Tony, her ex-fiancé, at her uncle’s diner. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Problems escalate as Genna discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down, and in the midst of all this, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it has always been in her blood and she questions if she should give up her fantastic new job offer to stay in Bristol and take care of her family and the diner.
Tony is also pushing her to stay but when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally get her over Tony. But Tony isn’t giving up that easily.
Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she goes back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is; which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Query- Emma's Heaven - Women's Fiction
There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. Then when she does, no one believes her.
When her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of two minutes, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? Not once was the child she saw her daughter. Her husband, her counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional. But then, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter, Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she managers to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away from their marriage. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and mother instinct, Megan risks her marriage and sanity to pursue the girl in the photograph. As she pieces together the disorienting trail, Megan begins to question whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Thanks everyone for your help.
When her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of two minutes, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? Not once was the child she saw her daughter. Her husband, her counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional. But then, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter, Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she managers to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away from their marriage. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and mother instinct, Megan risks her marriage and sanity to pursue the girl in the photograph. As she pieces together the disorienting trail, Megan begins to question whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Thanks everyone for your help.
Jul 29, 2010
REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction second revision
Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
If Genna had thought going home would be hell, she would have brought along her hand basket.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is more than excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion as executive kitchen manager at a swanky country club in Delaware. However, she isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she runs into her ex-fiancé. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Genna’s problems escalate as she discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it. Angie is hysterical over a bad pap smear and a broken marriage. Robby completely shuts down when he finds out his plaid and pearl wearing girlfriend is pregnant. To put the icing on the cake, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it is in her blood and she questions if she should give up her new job in Delaware to stay in Bristol. And when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally break down the walls she’s built around herself since the night her parents were killed by a drunk driver when she was a kid.
In twenty-one days, Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she heads back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is, which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Click here to read the first revision.
If Genna had thought going home would be hell, she would have brought along her hand basket.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is more than excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion as executive kitchen manager at a swanky country club in Delaware. However, she isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she runs into her ex-fiancé. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Genna’s problems escalate as she discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it. Angie is hysterical over a bad pap smear and a broken marriage. Robby completely shuts down when he finds out his plaid and pearl wearing girlfriend is pregnant. To put the icing on the cake, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it is in her blood and she questions if she should give up her new job in Delaware to stay in Bristol. And when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally break down the walls she’s built around herself since the night her parents were killed by a drunk driver when she was a kid.
In twenty-one days, Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she heads back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is, which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Jul 26, 2010
QUERY- REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction first revision
If Genna thought returning home after a long absence would be hell, she would have brought along her hand-basket. Wanting to celebrate the good news about her fabulous job offer, Genna realizes it’s time to relinquish her past demons and go home.
Not even there five minutes, it comes back to haunt her in the form of her ex-fiancé and her unresolved feelings for him. What he did a decade ago still twists her heart and when he asks for forgiveness, Genna decides to let the past go and move on. However, when Genna’s cousin reveals long buried secrets about her ex- Genna wonders if she made a mistake. “People don’t change” Angie says, but Genna has seen it happen in more than one person since returning. Including herself.
Unexpectedly, she discovers a promising new love in the arms of a man she once despised. Her family is pushing her into this new relationship but as she wrestles with her feelings, she makes the unbelievable mistake of sleeping with her ex-. Keeping the two men from finding out about each other proves to be impossible as they both show up for a date on the same night.
Moreover, her new promotion grows cold as she faces a family member’s health crisis no one saw coming. She wonders if she should skip the advancement and remain where she never wanted to leave or go and live the life she always thought she wanted. Genna, torn between two worlds, her decision to remain is the only one possible. However, which love will capture her heart, old or new?
I am seeking representation for REMEMBERING YOU, a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Thank you everyone, in advance for your comments.
Robin
Not even there five minutes, it comes back to haunt her in the form of her ex-fiancé and her unresolved feelings for him. What he did a decade ago still twists her heart and when he asks for forgiveness, Genna decides to let the past go and move on. However, when Genna’s cousin reveals long buried secrets about her ex- Genna wonders if she made a mistake. “People don’t change” Angie says, but Genna has seen it happen in more than one person since returning. Including herself.
Unexpectedly, she discovers a promising new love in the arms of a man she once despised. Her family is pushing her into this new relationship but as she wrestles with her feelings, she makes the unbelievable mistake of sleeping with her ex-. Keeping the two men from finding out about each other proves to be impossible as they both show up for a date on the same night.
Moreover, her new promotion grows cold as she faces a family member’s health crisis no one saw coming. She wonders if she should skip the advancement and remain where she never wanted to leave or go and live the life she always thought she wanted. Genna, torn between two worlds, her decision to remain is the only one possible. However, which love will capture her heart, old or new?
I am seeking representation for REMEMBERING YOU, a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Thank you everyone, in advance for your comments.
Robin
Jul 13, 2010
Query - It's All About the Music
Corinne’s best friend Heather breaks into her house to steal lyrics to enter her in the songwriting competition she’s been begging Corinne to do for more than a year. A bewildered Corinne gets a phone call from the manager of Christian Meyer, Chris, a man whose music she’s loved for years.
A week later she’s on a plane for California leaving her tidy home and six year old twins behind. After a weekend of writing music with Christian and swapping stories about their youth, Corinne heads home. Chris shows up a week later.
Corinne is suddenly in the most passionate relationship of her life. Chris immerses himself in her beloved routine and adores her children. Almost immediately the chaos of his life creeps into hers and she begins to realize the complexities of being with someone like him. With tour dates set and a long separation looming in the very near future, Corinne is forced to choose between the man she loves and the quiet, stable life she’s worked so hard to achieve.
It’s All About the Music is a 108,000 word work of women’s fiction written in Corinne’s first person view. This is my first novel and I am seeking representation.
Thank you so much for your time and consideration,
Jolene B Perry
This is one of two that I've written. If you guys tear it to shreds - and please feel free - maybe I'll post number two.
A week later she’s on a plane for California leaving her tidy home and six year old twins behind. After a weekend of writing music with Christian and swapping stories about their youth, Corinne heads home. Chris shows up a week later.
Corinne is suddenly in the most passionate relationship of her life. Chris immerses himself in her beloved routine and adores her children. Almost immediately the chaos of his life creeps into hers and she begins to realize the complexities of being with someone like him. With tour dates set and a long separation looming in the very near future, Corinne is forced to choose between the man she loves and the quiet, stable life she’s worked so hard to achieve.
It’s All About the Music is a 108,000 word work of women’s fiction written in Corinne’s first person view. This is my first novel and I am seeking representation.
Thank you so much for your time and consideration,
Jolene B Perry
This is one of two that I've written. If you guys tear it to shreds - and please feel free - maybe I'll post number two.
Jul 1, 2010
Query- Back To Me (rewrite)
Click here to read the original query.
Dear [Agent]:
Kate Dalton and Jake Bailey were each other’s boomerang love – the person who comes back when you set them free. Or at least that’s what Kate had always thought.
Kate and Jake had both marveled over the years at how they found their way back to one another again and again. He’d supported her decision to move 3,000 miles to attend her dream law school, even though it meant they wouldn’t be together. He wasn’t perfect, he’d let his insecurities get in the way more than once over the years, but she knew he would jump in front of a freight train for her when it came right down to it.
It was an innate trust in the strength of their bond that had allowed them to let go of each other in the past. Not this time though. When an unexpected phone call ends their relationship, Kate is tortured by the realization that she’s lost Jake for good. As she struggles to imagine life without Jake, she becomes consumed with thoughts of him.
It’s not until her old friend, Charlie, moves back to town that Kate slowly begins to come back to life. When Charlie surprises her with a kiss one night, her childhood crush on him comes flooding back to the surface. Instead of being excited at the prospect of moving on, however, Kate is terrified that letting Charlie into her life means leaving Jake behind forever.
BACK TO ME is a completed women's fiction novel at 80,000 words.
I am a [profession], and my nonfiction book [title] is due out with [established publisher in this area of nonfiction] in early 2011. I also write for [well-known national publication] in their [ ] section, and have been published by a leading national journal, an online magazine and a number of news outlets and blogs for my work on [area of expertise from nonfiction book]. I make regular television appearances with [regional television network] and blog on their website. Though none of these experiences directly relates to writing fiction, all of them have given me opportunities to grow as a writer and have prepared me for the editing process.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Yours truly,
[Name]
[Contact Info]
Dear [Agent]:
Kate Dalton and Jake Bailey were each other’s boomerang love – the person who comes back when you set them free. Or at least that’s what Kate had always thought.
Kate and Jake had both marveled over the years at how they found their way back to one another again and again. He’d supported her decision to move 3,000 miles to attend her dream law school, even though it meant they wouldn’t be together. He wasn’t perfect, he’d let his insecurities get in the way more than once over the years, but she knew he would jump in front of a freight train for her when it came right down to it.
It was an innate trust in the strength of their bond that had allowed them to let go of each other in the past. Not this time though. When an unexpected phone call ends their relationship, Kate is tortured by the realization that she’s lost Jake for good. As she struggles to imagine life without Jake, she becomes consumed with thoughts of him.
It’s not until her old friend, Charlie, moves back to town that Kate slowly begins to come back to life. When Charlie surprises her with a kiss one night, her childhood crush on him comes flooding back to the surface. Instead of being excited at the prospect of moving on, however, Kate is terrified that letting Charlie into her life means leaving Jake behind forever.
BACK TO ME is a completed women's fiction novel at 80,000 words.
I am a [profession], and my nonfiction book [title] is due out with [established publisher in this area of nonfiction] in early 2011. I also write for [well-known national publication] in their [ ] section, and have been published by a leading national journal, an online magazine and a number of news outlets and blogs for my work on [area of expertise from nonfiction book]. I make regular television appearances with [regional television network] and blog on their website. Though none of these experiences directly relates to writing fiction, all of them have given me opportunities to grow as a writer and have prepared me for the editing process.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Yours truly,
[Name]
[Contact Info]
Jun 29, 2010
Query - Back to Me
Dear Agent,
Jake Bailey is Kate Dalton’s boomerang love, the person from the famous Richard Bach quote who comes back when you set them free. Unfortunately for Kate, good ole Richard never said anything about what it meant when this scenario happened over and over again.
No matter how many times Kate let Jake fly free into the world, he always came back when she least expected it. She’d try to move on with someone new only to come home from a wonderful date to find Jake on her doorstep. One look at those twinkling green eyes and that boyish grin and she couldn’t help but remember she loved him.
Now it’s been eight years since they first met and Kate finds herself faced with the realization that Jake won’t be coming back this time. As she reflects on their time together, she’s torn between the empty ache in her chest and the chance to start fresh with someone new. Can Kate learn how to say goodbye to someone she’s not certain she can live without?
"Back to Me" is a completed 80,000 word women’s fiction manuscript.
I am a [occupation] and soon-to-be published author. My nonfiction book [Title Redacted] is due out with [Publishing Company] in early 2011. I also write for [well-known publication] in their [name of section], and have been published by a leading journal, an online magazine and a number of news outlets and blogs for my work on [certain topics]. I make regular television appearances with [regional television network] and blog on their website. Though none of these experiences directly relates to writing fiction, all of them have given me opportunities to grow as a writer and have prepared me for the editing process.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours truly,
[Hopeful Fiction Author]
Jake Bailey is Kate Dalton’s boomerang love, the person from the famous Richard Bach quote who comes back when you set them free. Unfortunately for Kate, good ole Richard never said anything about what it meant when this scenario happened over and over again.
No matter how many times Kate let Jake fly free into the world, he always came back when she least expected it. She’d try to move on with someone new only to come home from a wonderful date to find Jake on her doorstep. One look at those twinkling green eyes and that boyish grin and she couldn’t help but remember she loved him.
Now it’s been eight years since they first met and Kate finds herself faced with the realization that Jake won’t be coming back this time. As she reflects on their time together, she’s torn between the empty ache in her chest and the chance to start fresh with someone new. Can Kate learn how to say goodbye to someone she’s not certain she can live without?
"Back to Me" is a completed 80,000 word women’s fiction manuscript.
I am a [occupation] and soon-to-be published author. My nonfiction book [Title Redacted] is due out with [Publishing Company] in early 2011. I also write for [well-known publication] in their [name of section], and have been published by a leading journal, an online magazine and a number of news outlets and blogs for my work on [certain topics]. I make regular television appearances with [regional television network] and blog on their website. Though none of these experiences directly relates to writing fiction, all of them have given me opportunities to grow as a writer and have prepared me for the editing process.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours truly,
[Hopeful Fiction Author]
Jun 10, 2010
QUERY- REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction
Dear Ms. Agent,
Ten years is a long time to live in a self-imposed exile and when Genna’s longing for the familiar turn into nightmares about her future, she realizes it’s time to go home.
Once there, the past comes back to haunt her in the form of her ex-fiancé and his dead wife. Genna’s unresolved feelings for him and what he did a decade ago only twist her heart and lead her down a perilous path. He wants her back and Genna wonders if it’s only for her money.
Coming home has also brought her aunt’s Alzheimer’s to light, something the family refuses to face. Her cousin is falling apart under the strain of a too perfect marriage and her best friend is ignoring her. Genna also finds herself encumbered with an inheritance that threatens to destroy her relationship with her uncle.
What’s a girl to do?
Genna needs to makes some tough decisions regarding her future; does she give up the job of a lifetime and come home to work for peanuts or does she go back and live the same lonely life she’s had for the last decade? And will trying to get over her broken heart lead her to find comfort in the arms of a man she once despised? With the help of the only person who has ever put her first, Genna makes the decisions that will change her life forever.
I am seeking representation for REMEMBERING YOU, a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words. (I have also added a sentence as to why I chose them as the agent.)
Thank you for your consideration.
Robin
Ten years is a long time to live in a self-imposed exile and when Genna’s longing for the familiar turn into nightmares about her future, she realizes it’s time to go home.
Once there, the past comes back to haunt her in the form of her ex-fiancé and his dead wife. Genna’s unresolved feelings for him and what he did a decade ago only twist her heart and lead her down a perilous path. He wants her back and Genna wonders if it’s only for her money.
Coming home has also brought her aunt’s Alzheimer’s to light, something the family refuses to face. Her cousin is falling apart under the strain of a too perfect marriage and her best friend is ignoring her. Genna also finds herself encumbered with an inheritance that threatens to destroy her relationship with her uncle.
What’s a girl to do?
Genna needs to makes some tough decisions regarding her future; does she give up the job of a lifetime and come home to work for peanuts or does she go back and live the same lonely life she’s had for the last decade? And will trying to get over her broken heart lead her to find comfort in the arms of a man she once despised? With the help of the only person who has ever put her first, Genna makes the decisions that will change her life forever.
I am seeking representation for REMEMBERING YOU, a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words. (I have also added a sentence as to why I chose them as the agent.)
Thank you for your consideration.
Robin
Jun 6, 2010
Query: House Dreams
I am writing to introduce my novel, House Dreams, for your consideration.
House Dreams is a work of women’s fiction about mothers and daughters, and about the sometimes destructive power of the imagination.
The main character, Lillian, is a home health aide who has built her career around choosing assignments that allow her to live briefly in the houses of people much wealthier than herself. Her devotion is lavished on the houses she can pretend are hers for the duration of her stay, while her care for her patients is chilly and efficient.
As the novel opens, Lillian arrives at a new house, inhabited by a demanding, bed-ridden elderly woman, Ellen Whitmore. But this house is different: from the moment she arrives, Lillian finds the house and everything in it strangely familiar. As the days go by, she is drawn deeper into her fantasy of possessing the house.
The arrival of Ellen’s daughter and teenage granddaughter is an unwelcome interruption for Lillian. Ellen and her daughter, Carlotta, have been estranged since Carlotta’s marriage, and Ellen has never met her granddaughter, Maggie. Carlotta’s relationship with Ellen remains remote but Maggie is entranced by her grandmother’s stories of her youth. Maggie also tries to befriend Lillian, although Lillian is irritated by Maggie’s mannerisms, intrusiveness and aura of privilege.
Life for the four women settles into a routine of fragile alliances until a sudden crisis in Ellen’s health forces Lillian to realize that the imaginary home and family she has built for herself are necessarily impermanent: Ellen is failing, and Carlotta and Maggie will be leaving in time for Maggie to start school in the fall. Lillian will have to return to her life of brief sojourns in other people’s houses.
Carlotta and Ellen have several confrontations about Carlotta’s marriage and about Carlotta’s unhappy childhood. As her relationship with Carlotta deteriorates, Ellen starts to hint that she may leave the house to Lillian. Ellen is hoping for Lillian’s attention and loyalty, but that temptation, and her passion for the house, lead Lillian down a very different, and dangerous, path.
House Dreams is my first novel. Portions of my first book, a short story collection, have appeared in Kalliope and PMS, and in the anthology Prompted. I have had other short fiction published on line. I am currently at work on my second novel.
House Dreams is a work of women’s fiction about mothers and daughters, and about the sometimes destructive power of the imagination.
The main character, Lillian, is a home health aide who has built her career around choosing assignments that allow her to live briefly in the houses of people much wealthier than herself. Her devotion is lavished on the houses she can pretend are hers for the duration of her stay, while her care for her patients is chilly and efficient.
As the novel opens, Lillian arrives at a new house, inhabited by a demanding, bed-ridden elderly woman, Ellen Whitmore. But this house is different: from the moment she arrives, Lillian finds the house and everything in it strangely familiar. As the days go by, she is drawn deeper into her fantasy of possessing the house.
The arrival of Ellen’s daughter and teenage granddaughter is an unwelcome interruption for Lillian. Ellen and her daughter, Carlotta, have been estranged since Carlotta’s marriage, and Ellen has never met her granddaughter, Maggie. Carlotta’s relationship with Ellen remains remote but Maggie is entranced by her grandmother’s stories of her youth. Maggie also tries to befriend Lillian, although Lillian is irritated by Maggie’s mannerisms, intrusiveness and aura of privilege.
Life for the four women settles into a routine of fragile alliances until a sudden crisis in Ellen’s health forces Lillian to realize that the imaginary home and family she has built for herself are necessarily impermanent: Ellen is failing, and Carlotta and Maggie will be leaving in time for Maggie to start school in the fall. Lillian will have to return to her life of brief sojourns in other people’s houses.
Carlotta and Ellen have several confrontations about Carlotta’s marriage and about Carlotta’s unhappy childhood. As her relationship with Carlotta deteriorates, Ellen starts to hint that she may leave the house to Lillian. Ellen is hoping for Lillian’s attention and loyalty, but that temptation, and her passion for the house, lead Lillian down a very different, and dangerous, path.
House Dreams is my first novel. Portions of my first book, a short story collection, have appeared in Kalliope and PMS, and in the anthology Prompted. I have had other short fiction published on line. I am currently at work on my second novel.
May 3, 2010
Query:Snap
Dear Mr./Ms. Agent,
Julia Turnbolt, couldn’t have predicted that she, her cheating soon to be ex-husband Jack, and their two teenage kids, would end up on a tour boat in the middle of the sea with modern day pirates ready to slit their throats. Sure, if you look at the past year, between finding Jack banging a nineteen year old bimbo, the murder of her best friend and of course Julia’s recent stint in rehab for her raging Oxycontin addiction, this new crock of crap kind of makes sense. But all that was supposed to be behind her when Chelsea, her daughter, won this all-inclusive trip for four to Thailand.
I mean come on, Julia’s used to slinging fries not fighting blood-thirsty thugs. So even though she can’t swim a stroke and the family’s chances of getting rescued are pretty much nil, Jacks plan for them all to board a flimsy dinghy and set adrift in the sea seems right. Days later when Julia’s way beyond regretting listening to Jack’s hair-brained plan, they find an uninhabited island. Lets face it, finding land after almost dying at sea seems like a step in the right direction, right? Nope, because their supposed sanctuary just happens to be the very same place where their former captors stash their booty. Now with the brutes just a breath away from finding the family’s makeshift camp and Jack laid out with a mysterious fever, Julia’s got one option, fight. Suddenly the new rules are, there aren’t any, and with everyone’s life on the line, doing whatever it takes, and that means whatever, suddenly seems like a pretty decent plan.
Snap is Contemporary Women's Fiction complete at about 80,000. I can be reached at the email address provided. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,Writer
Julia Turnbolt, couldn’t have predicted that she, her cheating soon to be ex-husband Jack, and their two teenage kids, would end up on a tour boat in the middle of the sea with modern day pirates ready to slit their throats. Sure, if you look at the past year, between finding Jack banging a nineteen year old bimbo, the murder of her best friend and of course Julia’s recent stint in rehab for her raging Oxycontin addiction, this new crock of crap kind of makes sense. But all that was supposed to be behind her when Chelsea, her daughter, won this all-inclusive trip for four to Thailand.
I mean come on, Julia’s used to slinging fries not fighting blood-thirsty thugs. So even though she can’t swim a stroke and the family’s chances of getting rescued are pretty much nil, Jacks plan for them all to board a flimsy dinghy and set adrift in the sea seems right. Days later when Julia’s way beyond regretting listening to Jack’s hair-brained plan, they find an uninhabited island. Lets face it, finding land after almost dying at sea seems like a step in the right direction, right? Nope, because their supposed sanctuary just happens to be the very same place where their former captors stash their booty. Now with the brutes just a breath away from finding the family’s makeshift camp and Jack laid out with a mysterious fever, Julia’s got one option, fight. Suddenly the new rules are, there aren’t any, and with everyone’s life on the line, doing whatever it takes, and that means whatever, suddenly seems like a pretty decent plan.
Snap is Contemporary Women's Fiction complete at about 80,000. I can be reached at the email address provided. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,Writer
Apr 15, 2010
Query- Four Thousand Miles (revised)
Click here to read the original query.
Hopefully, this is the last version...
When Natalie Spencer loses her job, she returns home unexpectedly to find her husband in bed with his business partner… Jeremy. In shock, Natalie boards the first flight to the English-speaking destination on the United Airlines flight board – London, England. Armed with only her purse, Natalie is nearly mugged in a Tube station. Her attackers are scared off by an introverted songwriter Gavin Ashby. Recognizing Natalie’s fragile state, Gavin offers help and eventually invites her to recuperate from her trauma at his home in Pluckley, Kent.
Unaccustomed to the role of “damsel in distress,” Natalie gets her strength back by helping others. She encourages Gavin to reinvigorate his music career, provides mentorship to girls at the farm, and very reluctantly supports her husband via email while he deals with his new, publicly gay life. Gavin’s family and friends begin to accept Natalie into their lives, particularly his niece. Natalie finds healing in the Kent countryside, but continues to look at her time in England as a break from her “real life,” not a permanent option. When Gavin’s best friend, Avery, asks Natalie on a date, Gavin realizes his feelings for Natalie go beyond friendship and makes his move. Just when the pair seems to be heading in the right direction, a car accident involving the niece and a verbal attack on Natalie by Gavin’s sister bring the budding relationship to a halt. Natalie must choose whether to abandon her old life for Gavin or to flee once again.
Complete at 95,000 words, Four Thousand Miles is women's fiction. My short story “Death of a Woman” was published in the Detroit literary magazine, The Furnace. Attached you will find the first three chapters of my novel. Thank you for your time.
Hopefully, this is the last version...
When Natalie Spencer loses her job, she returns home unexpectedly to find her husband in bed with his business partner… Jeremy. In shock, Natalie boards the first flight to the English-speaking destination on the United Airlines flight board – London, England. Armed with only her purse, Natalie is nearly mugged in a Tube station. Her attackers are scared off by an introverted songwriter Gavin Ashby. Recognizing Natalie’s fragile state, Gavin offers help and eventually invites her to recuperate from her trauma at his home in Pluckley, Kent.
Unaccustomed to the role of “damsel in distress,” Natalie gets her strength back by helping others. She encourages Gavin to reinvigorate his music career, provides mentorship to girls at the farm, and very reluctantly supports her husband via email while he deals with his new, publicly gay life. Gavin’s family and friends begin to accept Natalie into their lives, particularly his niece. Natalie finds healing in the Kent countryside, but continues to look at her time in England as a break from her “real life,” not a permanent option. When Gavin’s best friend, Avery, asks Natalie on a date, Gavin realizes his feelings for Natalie go beyond friendship and makes his move. Just when the pair seems to be heading in the right direction, a car accident involving the niece and a verbal attack on Natalie by Gavin’s sister bring the budding relationship to a halt. Natalie must choose whether to abandon her old life for Gavin or to flee once again.
Complete at 95,000 words, Four Thousand Miles is women's fiction. My short story “Death of a Woman” was published in the Detroit literary magazine, The Furnace. Attached you will find the first three chapters of my novel. Thank you for your time.
Mar 31, 2010
Query- Facets of Sorrow (revised)
Click here to read the original query.
Dear (Agent’s Name),
Facets of Sorrow is a work of women’s fiction, which is complete at 95,000 words.
Seven months after Gemma Allen’s first date with Aaron Dullis, he takes her to a hotel to celebrate her nineteenth birthday. She falls asleep in his arms, oblivious to the hints he’s been trying to give her: It will be their last night together because when he leaves for his commitment to the Marines, he’s not taking a commitment to her with him. He does leave, and she is heartbroken.
Two years later, Gemma meets Kyle Johnson. She’s not sure what to make of the gorgeous lawyer. Who gives a woman an ant farm on the first date… or any date? He may be odd, but he introduces something new into her life, something she needs: joy.
After a few years of marriage to Kyle, his secretive behavior and mysterious business trips have Gemma convinced he’s not who she thought he was. Her confusion worsens when Aaron returns and says he needs her in his life. She’s not sure which man she should be with – the one who needs her or the one she needs.
When Gemma learns Kyle’s secret, her determination to protect it unfurls a chain of events that land her in a hospital bed, Aaron in handcuffs and Kyle in a legal and ethical dilemma as he tries to clean up the mess they’ve all made.
I have a B.A. in English from the University of Texas. My previous writing experience includes serving as a ghostwriter for Life Builders, a nationwide mentoring ministry.
Thank you for your time and for considering my novel.
Sincerely,
Genevieve Wilson
Dear (Agent’s Name),
Facets of Sorrow is a work of women’s fiction, which is complete at 95,000 words.
Seven months after Gemma Allen’s first date with Aaron Dullis, he takes her to a hotel to celebrate her nineteenth birthday. She falls asleep in his arms, oblivious to the hints he’s been trying to give her: It will be their last night together because when he leaves for his commitment to the Marines, he’s not taking a commitment to her with him. He does leave, and she is heartbroken.
Two years later, Gemma meets Kyle Johnson. She’s not sure what to make of the gorgeous lawyer. Who gives a woman an ant farm on the first date… or any date? He may be odd, but he introduces something new into her life, something she needs: joy.
After a few years of marriage to Kyle, his secretive behavior and mysterious business trips have Gemma convinced he’s not who she thought he was. Her confusion worsens when Aaron returns and says he needs her in his life. She’s not sure which man she should be with – the one who needs her or the one she needs.
When Gemma learns Kyle’s secret, her determination to protect it unfurls a chain of events that land her in a hospital bed, Aaron in handcuffs and Kyle in a legal and ethical dilemma as he tries to clean up the mess they’ve all made.
I have a B.A. in English from the University of Texas. My previous writing experience includes serving as a ghostwriter for Life Builders, a nationwide mentoring ministry.
Thank you for your time and for considering my novel.
Sincerely,
Genevieve Wilson
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