Apr 15, 2009

Query- EVERLASTING (Revision #1)

Click here to read the original query.

Dear _______:
When you die, you’re supposed to fade to Everlasting. That’s what souls believe. But Jeanne has been dead for hundreds of years and yet she aimlessly wanders the halls of The Louvre in modern-day Paris.

Jeanne’s aimlessness ends the day she encounters Etienne Armand, a fashion designer on the brink of ruin. Finding that he can see her is a surprise which wrenches her into awareness. Released from her despondence, Jeanne is compelled to investigate the painful memories of her tragic past and is inexorably drawn into the world of the living. She embarks on a plan to help Etienne save his failing couture house and they recognize a mutual attraction with roots in the mysteries of her previous life.

Jeanne’s initial eagerness to find resolution and fade, morphs over the course of her journey into frantic desperation to remain in the land of the living. Unfortunately, fading is not the choice of the soul.

EVERLASTING is romantic fiction, with a supernatural twist, completed at 75,000 words for which I am seeking representation. Thank you for your time and kind consideration.


Anonymous said...

Hello Me,

Paragraph #2:
Jeanne's 'aimlessness'-I think this might need a stronger word or phrase that ties in why she has not moved on to the land of the dead.

Paragraph #3:
Jeanne’s initial eagerness to find resolution and fade-you might want to add 'to Everlasting' to remind where Jeanne is supposed to 'crossover'.

This novel sounds very interesting, 'me'! As all say, take with a grain of salt, only YOU know your story, but I hope another set of eyes on the query will help. It has helped me!

D. Ross

Lara said...

Thanks, D. Ross, Appreciate the comments!