Apr 13, 2009

Query - Quest Support

A revision of this query has been posted. Click here to read it.
A second revision has been posted. Click here to read it.

Dear (Agent),

An Ancient Evil has arisen, but a Cryptic Prophecy speaks of a Young Boy who will wield a Mystic Sword and defeat it. Gilbert Gaberlunzie has seen this tired old plot play out more times than he can count. Gilbert works at Quest Support, a call center that provides assistance to Heroes, Villains, and anyone else involved in Quests. Even though he’s sure he’d make a better adventurer than any of the idiots who call him, Gilbert is satisfied where he is. He loves…well, tolerates his job, and wants nothing more than to sit in his cubicle and drink coffee.

Things don’t work out quite that way. When Gilbert accidentally gets an extra-stupid Hero killed during the Final Battle with the Dark Lord, he puts the whole world in peril and loses his job to boot. Since his knowledge of fantasy clichés isn’t good for much else, Gilbert decides to defeat the Dark Lord himself and set things right. After doing interviews for party members and appropriating some malfunctioning magical artifacts from his ex-employer, Gilbert sets off on a journey down the well-trodden paths of fantasydom. His feet may hurt and he may be hopeless with a sword, but Gilbert is sure he’s ready for anything the genre throws at him, whether it’s elves, goblins, an oracle, or those giant spiders that always live in caves. But can he handle the inevitable Plot Twist?

QUEST SUPPORT is complete at 94,000 words. It is a lighthearted fantasy that pokes some good-natured fun at the genre’s clichés, and is a perfect antidote to the flood of Tired Tolkien Clones out there. It will appeal to readers sick of clueless cardboard characters, or anyone who’s ever wondered when Heroes wash their socks.

Thank you for your consideration,

Me

5 comments:

Rick Daley said...

Sorry it took so long to post this, it slipped between the cracks.

Interesting day...I've read 30 queries on Nathan Bransford's "Be an Agent for a Day" Contest, and "requested" partials for only 2.

If this were in there, I would surely ask for a partial. It's got a great voice, and witty to boot.

Good luck!

Alexandra Green said...

Yeah, this is great. I have a hard time with the flow of most queries but this moves so nicely I didn't have to re-read one sentence. And it looks interesting. The only thing I question is the agents you'll query. If you're going the route of fantasy agents, you might not want to bash the cliches quite so much at the end. I suppose that would only offend high fantasy though.

StrugglingToMakeIt said...

I like this query. It has excellent voice. The bit about the tired clones seems a little much to me, but of course, that could just be me. Good job.

Lara said...

I think it's a new idea which will catch attention. i would want to read.

Paul said...

Thanks for the feedback, everyone. I'll see about retooling the last paragraph a bit, and then maybe I can post the revision.