Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Click here to read the third revision.
Click here to read the fourth revision.
Click here to read the fifth revision.
A hard choice looms ahead for Rick Rivoire.
Last year he joined the Rainguns, an elite regiment of spellcasting cavalry. Since then, he's protected the people of Foverre from pirates, monsters, and foreign invasion. He's attained social status, financial independence, and confidence with women. Most precious of all, he's matured. He’s stopped wallowing in bitter childhood memories.
But Foverre is shifting its policies now, embracing slavery and religious persecution. Public discontent grows until civil war becomes inevitable. Joining a rebellion could land Rick on a prison ship, in slave-irons --- or on the same gallows where he watched his father hang.
The alternative looks no brighter. The status quo imperils Rick’s hard-won self-respect. Supporting tyranny would doom his quest to emulate the valiant swordswoman who rescued him at age nine from torture and worse.
The army has no room for fence-sitters. Can Rick keep defending a government he once admired, though its actions now disgust him? Or will he risk all he's achieved to chase justice?
This fantasy novel is Raingun. The era, musket and pike. It has about 90,000 words.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Aug 17, 2010
Aug 15, 2010
Sample Pages- Between by Cyndi Tefft
Click here to read the query.
Ravi’s lips were soft and familiar against mine, but my mind was elsewhere, obsessing about my upcoming finals. “Lindsey, you are so beautiful,” he said, pressing me tighter against the seat of the car. His mouth trailed over my jaw to my neck, his breath warm in my ear.
“I love you”, he whispered.
That snapped me back to reality.
Damn. I liked Ravi, I really did, but not as much as he liked me. The kissing was nice, but I didn’t feel IT, the connection, the zing. The L word? Damn, damn, damn! I had to say something but I didn’t want to lose him as a friend. Truthfully, he was my best friend. He’d helped me study for my French exam, even though he couldn’t speak a word of the language. When I’d told him about my parents’ divorce, he’d held me while I cried. He made up silly songs on the piano just to make me laugh. I did love him, in a way. Just not that way.
“Ravi…”
“You know what, never mind. Just forget I said anything, okay?” His voice was tight with embarrassment.
“No, really, it’s just…”
He jerked away and turned the key in the ignition, his lips pressed in a hard line. The engine roared to life. “It’s alright,” he said finally and flicked on the high beams. “It’s no big deal. Let’s just go.”
Fat droplets of rain splattered on the windshield and built into a steady drumming on the roof. The swish of the wipers and the hum of the heater echoed in the chasm between us and I struggled to think of a way to alleviate the tension. Ravi switched on the radio to an oldies station. “You Are So Beautiful” came on and I squirmed in my seat, remembering how Ravi had just said those very words to me.
“So-” I began.
“Hey-” he said at the same time.
We both stopped and a nervous giggle escaped me. Still, it was enough to break the silence and the knot in my gut relaxed.
“I was going to tell you, Micah and I are thinking of starting a band,” Ravi continued, his voice nonchalant. “I met this guy, Todd, in my Physics class who plays drums. With Micah on the guitar, all we’d need would be a lead singer. Would you be interested?”
“Really? Me?” I asked.
“Sure, I’ve heard you sing. You have a great voice.”
“Thanks,” I replied. I loved to sing, though I’d never been in a band before. I’d been in choir all through high school, but hadn’t ever sung a solo. A thrill ran through me at the idea of being on stage with the music thumping and colored lights swirling, while a throng of fans bounced to the beat below. “It sounds fun,” I said, already starting to dance in my seat at the thought. “When should we practice? Do you have any songs picked out?”
The highway was deserted and we hadn’t seen another car pass by us for miles. Ravi turned his head and smiled at me, giving minimal attention to the familiar road. “Yeah, Micah and I have a couple of…”
“Look out!” I yelled.
His eyes snapped forward and he slammed on the brakes. The sedan in front of us was creeping along and we came screaming up behind it. I recoiled in fear as the car started to hydroplane, the tires sliding across the slick asphalt. Ravi wrenched on the steering wheel and pumped the brakes, trying to regain control. The treads suddenly found purchase and sent us careening into the other lane. The stiff seatbelt cut into my neck as I was tossed against the door.
I was vaguely aware of Joe Cocker’s raspy voice crooning as we rammed into the other vehicle. The impact reverberated through my head, and from somewhere in the distance, I heard myself screaming in terror. Panic gripped the base of my neck, every muscle pulled taut with fear. The headlights flung streaks of light like fireworks in the driving rain as we spun out of control, then the tires found something to grab onto and we went sailing off the roadway.
The car hung in mid air and bile rose in my throat, then the hood smashed into the ground. My forehead smacked against the dash and I bit my tongue hard, the coppery taste of blood filling my mouth. Screeching metal and breaking glass echoed in concert with sickening thuds as the Mustang tumbled down the ravine. I was whipped upside down and Ravi’s body floated over mine as the car rolled, his face contorted in fear.
I couldn’t call out to him or even will myself to move, the centrifugal force alternately keeping me pressed against the door or yanking me against the biting restraint of the seatbelt. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind, I was aware it was my turn for the next impact. The blood froze in my veins. The trunk of the pine tree outside my window beckoned to me with relentless persistence. The metal car door wrapped around me in an unforgiving embrace, squeezing the air from my lungs.
Query - The End Begins
Dear XXXXX,
The end of the world might be coming, but not how we expected.
The people are suffering through the worst downturn in humanities history; aliens of all kinds are invading and taking over, plotting secret wars as the last superpowers of the world hang on trying to prevent what could be the Last war for the human race.
And yet there is a glimmer of hope in all this despair.
The End Begins, a Christian inspired epic sci-fi/fantasy story, follows Rai and her company who are, by fate, brought together to stop the conclusion of the End of Days by protecting the Artifact of Knowledge that may save or destroy them all. But enemies on all sides are coming and would-be allies sit back and watch as the event unfolds.
Do they have what it takes to complete the task against odds so great?
The End Begins, a 119,912 word novel seeks to compete in the Christian sci-fi market and stands apart not only by balancing the overall Sci-fi/fantastical and religious tones, similar to popular and uniquely epic titles like China Mieville’s Perdido Street Station and Terry Brook’s Shannara series, we’ll see Rai’s evolution from a fish-out-of-water sorceress who must cope with real world issues while trying to find her biological roots as she manages a retired soldier of valor, a priest past his prime, a rebellious mechanic, a wanting assassin, and a young lost traveler. All of them journey to save themselves through struggles both physical and emotional.
I’ve seen that your publishing house has published [insert works] and I think I would be a great fit for your roster of products. The End Begins is part one of a two part book series, the second is nearing completion of its first draft. Sample chapters are available upon request. Thank you for your time and consideration.
The end of the world might be coming, but not how we expected.
The people are suffering through the worst downturn in humanities history; aliens of all kinds are invading and taking over, plotting secret wars as the last superpowers of the world hang on trying to prevent what could be the Last war for the human race.
And yet there is a glimmer of hope in all this despair.
The End Begins, a Christian inspired epic sci-fi/fantasy story, follows Rai and her company who are, by fate, brought together to stop the conclusion of the End of Days by protecting the Artifact of Knowledge that may save or destroy them all. But enemies on all sides are coming and would-be allies sit back and watch as the event unfolds.
Do they have what it takes to complete the task against odds so great?
The End Begins, a 119,912 word novel seeks to compete in the Christian sci-fi market and stands apart not only by balancing the overall Sci-fi/fantastical and religious tones, similar to popular and uniquely epic titles like China Mieville’s Perdido Street Station and Terry Brook’s Shannara series, we’ll see Rai’s evolution from a fish-out-of-water sorceress who must cope with real world issues while trying to find her biological roots as she manages a retired soldier of valor, a priest past his prime, a rebellious mechanic, a wanting assassin, and a young lost traveler. All of them journey to save themselves through struggles both physical and emotional.
I’ve seen that your publishing house has published [insert works] and I think I would be a great fit for your roster of products. The End Begins is part one of a two part book series, the second is nearing completion of its first draft. Sample chapters are available upon request. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Query- Between
Lindsey Waters never spent much time thinking about death. It’s not that things were so rosy, given her parents’ bitter divorce, the pressure of finals, and a figure that was more blob than beauty. But whatever she expected, it wasn’t the handsome young Scotsman who appeared at her side the night she died in a car accident.
Aiden MacRae has been transporting souls from earth to heaven for the last 300 years, while he waits for the one whose love will redeem him. He introduces Lindsey to the realm in between where they relive memories together in vivid detail: the brutal Jacobite rebellion of 1719 that led to Aiden’s death, a ball at the Palace of Versailles before King Louis XIV, and even an outing to Seattle in the 21st century.
But even as she’s falling for him, heaven’s siren song is intensifying, pulling Lindsey away. Aiden is unable to go with her, for reasons he is unwilling to divulge.
When she is revived at the scene of the accident, Lindsey is left to pick up the pieces of her old life and find out if love really can transcend all boundaries.
Between, a YA crossover novel, is complete at 80,000 words. Thank you for taking the time to consider representing my work. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Cyndi Tefft
Aiden MacRae has been transporting souls from earth to heaven for the last 300 years, while he waits for the one whose love will redeem him. He introduces Lindsey to the realm in between where they relive memories together in vivid detail: the brutal Jacobite rebellion of 1719 that led to Aiden’s death, a ball at the Palace of Versailles before King Louis XIV, and even an outing to Seattle in the 21st century.
But even as she’s falling for him, heaven’s siren song is intensifying, pulling Lindsey away. Aiden is unable to go with her, for reasons he is unwilling to divulge.
When she is revived at the scene of the accident, Lindsey is left to pick up the pieces of her old life and find out if love really can transcend all boundaries.
Between, a YA crossover novel, is complete at 80,000 words. Thank you for taking the time to consider representing my work. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Cyndi Tefft
Aug 6, 2010
Query- Reluctant Queen
Dear Super Agent,
Nitokerty never wanted to be Pharaoh. Until her brother was murdered.
The gods have turned their backs on Egypt: the harvests are poor, the Pharaoh weak, and the nobility grown too powerful. As the Pharaoh’s youngest (and most spoiled) daughter, Nitokerty is forced to serve the temples in an attempt to appease the gods. But they have other plans for her.
Nitokerty returns to court when her father dies and falls in love with Anum, a mysterious courtier. When her older sister dies in childbirth, custom dictates Nitokerty must marry her brother. Anum secretly plots to overthrow her brother and has him murdered. When her brother is assassinated, Nitokerty seizes the Double Crown to seek revenge, not knowing the traitor is Anum, the man she thought she loved. Her final act of revenge guarantees her name will be remembered by history.
Inspired by a single line from the histories of Herodotus, RELUCTANT QUEEN is the story of one of Egypt’s only female Pharaohs. It is historical fiction complete at 85,000 words.
I am a history teacher who has traveled to Egypt twice, in order to better tell Nitokerty’s story. I have completed a second novel set in ancient Egypt and am currently at work on another on the Byzantine Empire.
Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Nitokerty never wanted to be Pharaoh. Until her brother was murdered.
The gods have turned their backs on Egypt: the harvests are poor, the Pharaoh weak, and the nobility grown too powerful. As the Pharaoh’s youngest (and most spoiled) daughter, Nitokerty is forced to serve the temples in an attempt to appease the gods. But they have other plans for her.
Nitokerty returns to court when her father dies and falls in love with Anum, a mysterious courtier. When her older sister dies in childbirth, custom dictates Nitokerty must marry her brother. Anum secretly plots to overthrow her brother and has him murdered. When her brother is assassinated, Nitokerty seizes the Double Crown to seek revenge, not knowing the traitor is Anum, the man she thought she loved. Her final act of revenge guarantees her name will be remembered by history.
Inspired by a single line from the histories of Herodotus, RELUCTANT QUEEN is the story of one of Egypt’s only female Pharaohs. It is historical fiction complete at 85,000 words.
I am a history teacher who has traveled to Egypt twice, in order to better tell Nitokerty’s story. I have completed a second novel set in ancient Egypt and am currently at work on another on the Byzantine Empire.
Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Aug 5, 2010
Query- Haven, YA (Revised)
Click here to read the original query.
Scar thought she was normal, that was before she was deemed too dangerous to fit into normal society – it’s not her fault her mother got a little too close to a vampire – and suddenly, she’s whisked away to a reform school for witches, werewolves and vampires.
As if surviving a paranormal reform school wasn't bad enough, Scar learns the hard way that breaking a witch's Frisbee can really piss him off, challenging a werewolf to a foot race is a bad idea – especially if you want to live, vampires hold serious grudges equipped with mean left hooks and sometimes the hardest secrets to keep are the most deadly.
Especially, if that secret is your own. Scar is the vilest creature that could ever exist – half-human.
When students begin to disappear, Scar starts seeing visions of the attacks. If that wasn't strange enough, a mysterious incriminating video surfaces placing Scar at one of the crime scenes, making her the prime suspect. Now she must race to prove her innocence before her true nature is exposed.
The only problem is that she’s not entirely sure she’s innocent.
Scar thought she was normal, that was before she was deemed too dangerous to fit into normal society – it’s not her fault her mother got a little too close to a vampire – and suddenly, she’s whisked away to a reform school for witches, werewolves and vampires.
As if surviving a paranormal reform school wasn't bad enough, Scar learns the hard way that breaking a witch's Frisbee can really piss him off, challenging a werewolf to a foot race is a bad idea – especially if you want to live, vampires hold serious grudges equipped with mean left hooks and sometimes the hardest secrets to keep are the most deadly.
Especially, if that secret is your own. Scar is the vilest creature that could ever exist – half-human.
When students begin to disappear, Scar starts seeing visions of the attacks. If that wasn't strange enough, a mysterious incriminating video surfaces placing Scar at one of the crime scenes, making her the prime suspect. Now she must race to prove her innocence before her true nature is exposed.
The only problem is that she’s not entirely sure she’s innocent.
Query- Emma's Heaven, Contemporary Women's Fiction (revised)
Click here to read the original query.
Thanks for everyone's help.
There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. When she does, no one believes her.
After her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of a few moments, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? The child was never Emma. Her husband, counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional.
However, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter: Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she manages to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and motherly instinct, Megan questions whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Thanks for everyone's help.
There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. When she does, no one believes her.
After her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of a few moments, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? The child was never Emma. Her husband, counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional.
However, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter: Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she manages to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and motherly instinct, Megan questions whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Aug 4, 2010
REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction third revison (and hopefully the last?)
Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion (a goal she’s been working toward all her life) as executive kitchen manager of a swanky Delaware country club. She isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she sees Tony, her ex-fiancé, at her uncle’s diner. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Problems escalate as Genna discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down, and in the midst of all this, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it has always been in her blood and she questions if she should give up her fantastic new job offer to stay in Bristol and take care of her family and the diner.
Tony is also pushing her to stay but when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally get her over Tony. But Tony isn’t giving up that easily.
Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she goes back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is; which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion (a goal she’s been working toward all her life) as executive kitchen manager of a swanky Delaware country club. She isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she sees Tony, her ex-fiancé, at her uncle’s diner. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Problems escalate as Genna discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down, and in the midst of all this, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it has always been in her blood and she questions if she should give up her fantastic new job offer to stay in Bristol and take care of her family and the diner.
Tony is also pushing her to stay but when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally get her over Tony. But Tony isn’t giving up that easily.
Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she goes back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is; which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Query - Hidden in Shadows
I would love for you to consider HIDDEN IN SHADOWS, a 96,000-word urban fantasy romance novel.
Lorna McCloud is an assassin hell bent on avenging her father's murder only she has no leads. Soon she has more important issues to deal with than whether to use a dagger or a gun to kill her next target.
First, she's captured by the Paranormal Intelligence Agency, a shady, clandestine organization. A PIA henchman tells Lorna that she has the ability to create and hide in artificial shadows, a power she had unknowingly used during her nightly killings. Lorna distrusts the agency, and manages to escape.
Then Lorna heads to a small island where many of her potential clients want the king dead. Lorna hasn't felt the stirrings of love in a long time, but something about the noble Alaric makes her long for the light after her lifetime spent in shadow.
Torn between murder and love, Lorna has never been able to escape her past or her ardent desire for revenge, and now they may prevent her from her only chance of living a normal, happy life.
I am the author of a medieval fantasy romance series, The Kingdom of Arnhem – Woman of Honor (2009) and Knight of Glory (2010) published with Desert Breeze Publishing. I have also sold six short stories for anthologies, two of which are under the pen name Nicolette Zamora.
Thank you so much for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Lorna McCloud is an assassin hell bent on avenging her father's murder only she has no leads. Soon she has more important issues to deal with than whether to use a dagger or a gun to kill her next target.
First, she's captured by the Paranormal Intelligence Agency, a shady, clandestine organization. A PIA henchman tells Lorna that she has the ability to create and hide in artificial shadows, a power she had unknowingly used during her nightly killings. Lorna distrusts the agency, and manages to escape.
Then Lorna heads to a small island where many of her potential clients want the king dead. Lorna hasn't felt the stirrings of love in a long time, but something about the noble Alaric makes her long for the light after her lifetime spent in shadow.
Torn between murder and love, Lorna has never been able to escape her past or her ardent desire for revenge, and now they may prevent her from her only chance of living a normal, happy life.
I am the author of a medieval fantasy romance series, The Kingdom of Arnhem – Woman of Honor (2009) and Knight of Glory (2010) published with Desert Breeze Publishing. I have also sold six short stories for anthologies, two of which are under the pen name Nicolette Zamora.
Thank you so much for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Query- Emma's Heaven - Women's Fiction
There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. Then when she does, no one believes her.
When her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of two minutes, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? Not once was the child she saw her daughter. Her husband, her counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional. But then, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter, Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she managers to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away from their marriage. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and mother instinct, Megan risks her marriage and sanity to pursue the girl in the photograph. As she pieces together the disorienting trail, Megan begins to question whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Thanks everyone for your help.
When her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of two minutes, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? Not once was the child she saw her daughter. Her husband, her counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional. But then, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter, Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she managers to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.
Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away from their marriage. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and mother instinct, Megan risks her marriage and sanity to pursue the girl in the photograph. As she pieces together the disorienting trail, Megan begins to question whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.
Thanks everyone for your help.
Query- The Hunted of 2060 (revised)
Click here to read the original query.
HERE IS A RE_WRITE THANKS TO COMMENTS. Please let me know if I am any closer:)
The Hunted of 2060
Paranormal ChickLit with a side of SciFi
85,000 words
America 2060. Three Lovers. Two Species. One Way to Survive.
An original, dark paranormal chick-lit with a side of sci-fi. Nineteen year old April discovers the secrets within herself are the very secrets that are being hunted by a group dubbed the Rogue Militia. As April uncovers that she is a mixed of human and alien DNA, she finds herself on a dangerous path of self-discovery, belonging to a hybrid species on the verge of extinction.
At University, Robert, the love of her life, is put at risk as she struggles with who she was and who she is becoming, while a hybrid family she never knew existed enters her life, a hybrid male pursues her, and her existence becomes a cat and mouse game with enemies she will have to outrun, outfight or outwit to survive. Under General Raul, the military has no mercy for a foreign species that invaded earth in 2020 and when April realizes the General has secrets of his own, which have robbed her of her birth mother, grandfather and involve stolen hybrid DNA, she knows she must save more than herself or the world will fall into the hands of a madman.
With underlining themes of how prejudice breaks human connections and a theme of wildlife conservation, April speaks to the core of what makes us human. Fans of Gena Showater's 'Teen Alien Huntress', and Maggie Steifvarter's 'Shiver', as well as fans of the movie 'Cursed' starring Josh Jackson, and fans of Keri Arthur's Riley Jenson series will enjoy this Hunted of 2060 series.
HERE IS A RE_WRITE THANKS TO COMMENTS. Please let me know if I am any closer:)
The Hunted of 2060
Paranormal ChickLit with a side of SciFi
85,000 words
America 2060. Three Lovers. Two Species. One Way to Survive.
An original, dark paranormal chick-lit with a side of sci-fi. Nineteen year old April discovers the secrets within herself are the very secrets that are being hunted by a group dubbed the Rogue Militia. As April uncovers that she is a mixed of human and alien DNA, she finds herself on a dangerous path of self-discovery, belonging to a hybrid species on the verge of extinction.
At University, Robert, the love of her life, is put at risk as she struggles with who she was and who she is becoming, while a hybrid family she never knew existed enters her life, a hybrid male pursues her, and her existence becomes a cat and mouse game with enemies she will have to outrun, outfight or outwit to survive. Under General Raul, the military has no mercy for a foreign species that invaded earth in 2020 and when April realizes the General has secrets of his own, which have robbed her of her birth mother, grandfather and involve stolen hybrid DNA, she knows she must save more than herself or the world will fall into the hands of a madman.
With underlining themes of how prejudice breaks human connections and a theme of wildlife conservation, April speaks to the core of what makes us human. Fans of Gena Showater's 'Teen Alien Huntress', and Maggie Steifvarter's 'Shiver', as well as fans of the movie 'Cursed' starring Josh Jackson, and fans of Keri Arthur's Riley Jenson series will enjoy this Hunted of 2060 series.
Aug 2, 2010
Contest Alert!
Attention Slushpile followers:
Julie Cross, a long-time Slushpile follower (who I think holds the record for the most submissions ;-) is co-sponsoring a contest, and among the prizes are query and page critiques from an actual agent, an editor, and others in the publishing industry.
NOTE: "others in the publishing industry" is my way of saying "interns and assistants" but is NOT meant to belittle their professional opinions! They know what their agents like.
Julie's novel TEMPEST (once titled ENEMIES OF TIME) has been sold, resulting in a 3-book deal! She is represented by agent Suzie Townsend of FinePrint Lit.
Check Julie's blog for details, and good luck.
Julie Cross, a long-time Slushpile follower (who I think holds the record for the most submissions ;-) is co-sponsoring a contest, and among the prizes are query and page critiques from an actual agent, an editor, and others in the publishing industry.
NOTE: "others in the publishing industry" is my way of saying "interns and assistants" but is NOT meant to belittle their professional opinions! They know what their agents like.
Julie's novel TEMPEST (once titled ENEMIES OF TIME) has been sold, resulting in a 3-book deal! She is represented by agent Suzie Townsend of FinePrint Lit.
Check Julie's blog for details, and good luck.
QUERY - "Ever" YA Paranormal
Dear ______,
Waking up in a coffin hungry for blood is only the beginning for sixteen-year-old Everly Blue. Things are about to get a lot worse.
First, she finds out from the hot guy who dug her up that she’s a vampire. Well, half vampire, not that there’s much difference.
Then she meets her maker…Devon, the thousand-year-old vampire who turned her into a monster. He gives her a shred of hope – kill 100 vampires to save her humanity.
So with the help of Chance (the hottie who saved her, and who she’s falling for fast), Ever sets out to get her life back.
But it won’t be easy. She has to deal with her feelings for Chance, her hatred for Devon, some new-found vampire hunting friends and that pesky taste for blood that just won’t leave her alone.
In the end, Ever faces a battle – and a decision – that will change her life forever.
My young adult novel, EVER, is complete at 70,000 words. I think fans of supernatural hits like TWILIGHT and VAMPIRE ACADEMY will enjoy this story of a girl thrown into a life of danger and romance. The full manuscript is available, should you be interested.
Thank you so much for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Waking up in a coffin hungry for blood is only the beginning for sixteen-year-old Everly Blue. Things are about to get a lot worse.
First, she finds out from the hot guy who dug her up that she’s a vampire. Well, half vampire, not that there’s much difference.
Then she meets her maker…Devon, the thousand-year-old vampire who turned her into a monster. He gives her a shred of hope – kill 100 vampires to save her humanity.
So with the help of Chance (the hottie who saved her, and who she’s falling for fast), Ever sets out to get her life back.
But it won’t be easy. She has to deal with her feelings for Chance, her hatred for Devon, some new-found vampire hunting friends and that pesky taste for blood that just won’t leave her alone.
In the end, Ever faces a battle – and a decision – that will change her life forever.
My young adult novel, EVER, is complete at 70,000 words. I think fans of supernatural hits like TWILIGHT and VAMPIRE ACADEMY will enjoy this story of a girl thrown into a life of danger and romance. The full manuscript is available, should you be interested.
Thank you so much for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Aug 1, 2010
Query- The Hunted of 2060
The Hunted of 2060
Paranormal Sci-Fi Romance
85,000 words
America 2060. Three Lovers. Two Species. One Way to Survive.
An original, dark paranormal, sci-fi romance about a nineteen year old sophomore who discovers the secrets within herself are the very secrets that are being hunted by a group dubbed the Rogue Militia.
As April uncovers that she is in fact a hybrid mixed with human and alien DNA, she finds herself on a dangerous path of self-discovery, belonging to a species on the verge of extinction. At Alaska University, Robert, the love of her life, is put at risk as she struggles with who she was and who she is becoming, while a hybrid family she never knew existed enters her life, a hybrid male pursues her, and her existence becomes a cat and mouse game with enemies she will have to outrun, outfight or outwit to survive.
Under General Raul's orders, the military alliance has no mercy or compassion for a foreign species that invaded earth in 2020 and when April realizes the General has secrets of his own, which have robbed her of her birth mother, grandfather and involve stolen hybrid DNA, she knows she must save more than herself or the world will fall into the hands of a madman.
With the help of her grandfather, Colonial Marn, and the family of hybrids, April eventually destroys General Raul and the Shifter Counterinsurgency Military within homeland Security, the alliance the hybrids dubbed the Rogue Militia, after much sacrifice and loss. Though in the end, April and Robert are finally free of the Rogue Militia, and a new life is born from April's womb, the two realize in the wake of public suspicion and prejudice, destroying the Rogue Militia was just the beginning.
With underlining themes of how prejudice breaks human connections and a theme of animal/wildlife conservation, this novel will leave the reader flipping through the pages of April’s story. Though a hybrid, she speaks to the very core of what makes us human.
Fans of Gena Showater's 'Teen Alien Huntress', and Maggie Steifvarter's 'Shiver', as well as fans of the movie 'Cursed' starring Josh Jackson, and fans of Keri Arthur's Riley Jenson series will enjoy this Hunted of 2060 series.
The prequel and sequel are being written.
http://amiblackwelder.com
MARKETING:
I am active online with Forums: facebook, blogger, freado, reading groups, kindle boards, Bitten By Books Blood Bank, Permuted Press, Author Supporting Authors Ning, Paranormal Romance, SFX Magazine, Gothic.net.
I have also created freado interactive previews, excerpts, character descriptions, quotes to display on various online sites.
I have created fun quizzes to get to know the characters better and displayed them on blogger and facebook.
I am a member of the Virtual Book Tour and have lined up for me about twenty blogs where I will be interviewed over May/June/July.
I have actively pursued review blogs and ezines and have been accepted and my reviews will be displayed over June, July and August.
I have advertising space on Coalition for Independent Authors, Bareback ezine, Virtual Book Tours Cafe, Bitten By Books, Book Cubby, Catch the Drift with Mama Snow Blog, and am actively pursuing other advertising venues.
I have FREE posters advertised on my blog and on scribed where fans may download the free poster .pdf
I am also listed online with various public publication services such as scribed, smashwords, lulu to spread the word.
I have book giveaways on the VBT (Virtual Book Tour), facebook and locally as well as sending a few books out to celebrities/directors/producers monthly.
I have my own facebook page for The Hunted of 2060 Fans.
Began my own 'forum' for discussion about The Hunted.
Began my own Merchandise online for The Hunted.
Offline I am advertising posters, bookmarks and business cards to spread the word for those interested in purchasing online as well as offer prints locally for those interested in direct purchases.
Paranormal Sci-Fi Romance
85,000 words
America 2060. Three Lovers. Two Species. One Way to Survive.
An original, dark paranormal, sci-fi romance about a nineteen year old sophomore who discovers the secrets within herself are the very secrets that are being hunted by a group dubbed the Rogue Militia.
As April uncovers that she is in fact a hybrid mixed with human and alien DNA, she finds herself on a dangerous path of self-discovery, belonging to a species on the verge of extinction. At Alaska University, Robert, the love of her life, is put at risk as she struggles with who she was and who she is becoming, while a hybrid family she never knew existed enters her life, a hybrid male pursues her, and her existence becomes a cat and mouse game with enemies she will have to outrun, outfight or outwit to survive.
Under General Raul's orders, the military alliance has no mercy or compassion for a foreign species that invaded earth in 2020 and when April realizes the General has secrets of his own, which have robbed her of her birth mother, grandfather and involve stolen hybrid DNA, she knows she must save more than herself or the world will fall into the hands of a madman.
With the help of her grandfather, Colonial Marn, and the family of hybrids, April eventually destroys General Raul and the Shifter Counterinsurgency Military within homeland Security, the alliance the hybrids dubbed the Rogue Militia, after much sacrifice and loss. Though in the end, April and Robert are finally free of the Rogue Militia, and a new life is born from April's womb, the two realize in the wake of public suspicion and prejudice, destroying the Rogue Militia was just the beginning.
With underlining themes of how prejudice breaks human connections and a theme of animal/wildlife conservation, this novel will leave the reader flipping through the pages of April’s story. Though a hybrid, she speaks to the very core of what makes us human.
Fans of Gena Showater's 'Teen Alien Huntress', and Maggie Steifvarter's 'Shiver', as well as fans of the movie 'Cursed' starring Josh Jackson, and fans of Keri Arthur's Riley Jenson series will enjoy this Hunted of 2060 series.
The prequel and sequel are being written.
http://amiblackwelder.com
MARKETING:
I am active online with Forums: facebook, blogger, freado, reading groups, kindle boards, Bitten By Books Blood Bank, Permuted Press, Author Supporting Authors Ning, Paranormal Romance, SFX Magazine, Gothic.net.
I have also created freado interactive previews, excerpts, character descriptions, quotes to display on various online sites.
I have created fun quizzes to get to know the characters better and displayed them on blogger and facebook.
I am a member of the Virtual Book Tour and have lined up for me about twenty blogs where I will be interviewed over May/June/July.
I have actively pursued review blogs and ezines and have been accepted and my reviews will be displayed over June, July and August.
I have advertising space on Coalition for Independent Authors, Bareback ezine, Virtual Book Tours Cafe, Bitten By Books, Book Cubby, Catch the Drift with Mama Snow Blog, and am actively pursuing other advertising venues.
I have FREE posters advertised on my blog and on scribed where fans may download the free poster .pdf
I am also listed online with various public publication services such as scribed, smashwords, lulu to spread the word.
I have book giveaways on the VBT (Virtual Book Tour), facebook and locally as well as sending a few books out to celebrities/directors/producers monthly.
I have my own facebook page for The Hunted of 2060 Fans.
Began my own 'forum' for discussion about The Hunted.
Began my own Merchandise online for The Hunted.
Offline I am advertising posters, bookmarks and business cards to spread the word for those interested in purchasing online as well as offer prints locally for those interested in direct purchases.
Jul 29, 2010
REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction second revision
Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
If Genna had thought going home would be hell, she would have brought along her hand basket.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is more than excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion as executive kitchen manager at a swanky country club in Delaware. However, she isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she runs into her ex-fiancé. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Genna’s problems escalate as she discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it. Angie is hysterical over a bad pap smear and a broken marriage. Robby completely shuts down when he finds out his plaid and pearl wearing girlfriend is pregnant. To put the icing on the cake, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it is in her blood and she questions if she should give up her new job in Delaware to stay in Bristol. And when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally break down the walls she’s built around herself since the night her parents were killed by a drunk driver when she was a kid.
In twenty-one days, Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she heads back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is, which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Click here to read the first revision.
If Genna had thought going home would be hell, she would have brought along her hand basket.
Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is more than excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion as executive kitchen manager at a swanky country club in Delaware. However, she isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she runs into her ex-fiancé. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.
Genna’s problems escalate as she discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it. Angie is hysterical over a bad pap smear and a broken marriage. Robby completely shuts down when he finds out his plaid and pearl wearing girlfriend is pregnant. To put the icing on the cake, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.
Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it is in her blood and she questions if she should give up her new job in Delaware to stay in Bristol. And when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally break down the walls she’s built around herself since the night her parents were killed by a drunk driver when she was a kid.
In twenty-one days, Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she heads back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is, which man will she choose?
REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Seaweeds Query (version 4)
Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
An unusual love triangle arises between a young man, a mermaid, and a siren in SEAWEEDS, a 65,000-word contemporary fantasy.
Sky Hunter’s twenty-third birthday brings him a boat party, strange presents, and a hook-up with sexy Melanie. An evening of pleasure turns into a night of survival when Sky falls off the boat and nearly drowns. He is rescued by a mermaid and winds up on the beach the next morning, disoriented and having no clue what saved him until he discovers a girl with violet eyes washed up nearby. She can’t speak and has trouble walking. Sky believes the girl is the mermaid. Why she is a human now bewilders him, but her charm and innocence draws him to help her. Sky is poetic so he calls her Pearl because she comes from the ocean. And in a few short days, Sky falls head over heels for her.
He’s not bothered by her strange behaviors, such as hitting the car horn whenever they go for a ride or eating all his cat’s sardines. In fact, they make her all the more enjoyable to be around because he never knows what to expect, like when she dances at his sister’s wedding or when her first words are: “Love. Pearl love Sky.”
There’s just one problem. Melanie is livid about Sky’s new girlfriend. She slaughters his cat and threatens to murder his family if he chooses to stay with Pearl. Sky refuses to give in to Melanie’s threats, certain that he can outsmart her. But when he discovers that Melanie is a siren who has to seduce a man before feeding him to the ocean, he must find a way to resist her advances long enough to save himself—and Pearl.
SEAWEEDS is The Little Mermaid meets Fatal Attraction. Thank you for your time and consideration.
I've gotten so much help already and I really feel my query is close to being ready for agents but I'm still torn with a couple of lines such as: "Sky is poetic so he calls her Pearl because she comes from the ocean." I also have a new paragraph in the middle. THANKS!
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.
An unusual love triangle arises between a young man, a mermaid, and a siren in SEAWEEDS, a 65,000-word contemporary fantasy.
Sky Hunter’s twenty-third birthday brings him a boat party, strange presents, and a hook-up with sexy Melanie. An evening of pleasure turns into a night of survival when Sky falls off the boat and nearly drowns. He is rescued by a mermaid and winds up on the beach the next morning, disoriented and having no clue what saved him until he discovers a girl with violet eyes washed up nearby. She can’t speak and has trouble walking. Sky believes the girl is the mermaid. Why she is a human now bewilders him, but her charm and innocence draws him to help her. Sky is poetic so he calls her Pearl because she comes from the ocean. And in a few short days, Sky falls head over heels for her.
He’s not bothered by her strange behaviors, such as hitting the car horn whenever they go for a ride or eating all his cat’s sardines. In fact, they make her all the more enjoyable to be around because he never knows what to expect, like when she dances at his sister’s wedding or when her first words are: “Love. Pearl love Sky.”
There’s just one problem. Melanie is livid about Sky’s new girlfriend. She slaughters his cat and threatens to murder his family if he chooses to stay with Pearl. Sky refuses to give in to Melanie’s threats, certain that he can outsmart her. But when he discovers that Melanie is a siren who has to seduce a man before feeding him to the ocean, he must find a way to resist her advances long enough to save himself—and Pearl.
SEAWEEDS is The Little Mermaid meets Fatal Attraction. Thank you for your time and consideration.
I've gotten so much help already and I really feel my query is close to being ready for agents but I'm still torn with a couple of lines such as: "Sky is poetic so he calls her Pearl because she comes from the ocean." I also have a new paragraph in the middle. THANKS!
Nonfiction Query: Einstein's Gift: The Engineering of Lucid Dreams
What if you were given a set of cognitive tools that enabled you to lucid dream any conceivable experience with precision? What if these tools not only opened up a brand new area of experience, but also unified previously disparate facts in the fields of, science, art theory and consciousness studies?
Einstein’s Gift: The Engineering of Lucid Dreams unifies disparate facts in three fields of study. In the field of science, empirical evidence proves that our senses do not perceive objects, rather they detect an abstraction that philosophers call raw sense data, or more accurately, abstract sense data). In the field of art, the advent of Cubist painting 1910-1912 is Braque and Picasso’s unconscious acknowledgement that the senses perceive an abstraction. This acknowledgement continues through the Movements of Modern Art and continues into Post Modern and Contemporary Art. In the forty-year-old field of consciousness studies, the fact that the senses perceive abstract sense data, lays an empirical foundation for a radically new kind of science – a first-person science of consciousness. Handling abstract sense data allows anyone who is interested the ability not only to choose the contents of their lucid dreams before hand, but also to experience themselves in two places at one time. Einstein's Gift is a must-have for lucid dreamers, artists, academics, and anyone interested in the nature of consciousness.
A first-person science of consciousness attempts to bring the spiritual back into science and is one of academia’s hottest new fields of study. Roger Penrose, Dan Lloyd, and Douglas R. Hofstadter, all contemporary academic scholars involved in attempts to establish a first-person science of consciousness, are employing narrative non-fiction as a means to explain their theories of consciousness. Unlike their books, which define and philosophize the nature of consciousness, Einstein’s Gift narrates actual first-hand experiences from the author's own engineered lucid dreams. The Engineering of Lucid Dreams eschews narrating details of the author's personal day-to-day life and instead utilizes a fictional, but academic dialogue between two characters. The first character is a college student studying abstract art (a portrayal of the author learning how to engineer lucid dreams). The second is Einstein (based on the historical Albert Einstein 1879 – 1955 whose intellectual commentary and guidance are based upon 17 years of the author’s academic and shamanic study). In the classic Aristotle vs. Socrates dialogue and debate, the young painter and Einstein argue over the existence of abstract and imaginary sense data, the nature of Postmodern Art, the Movements of Modern Art, the disappearance of the Avant-Garde and the exquisite nature of engineered lucid dreams.
The Engineering of Lucid Dreams unifies a new cognitive understanding of abstract art with the contemporary academic attempt to establish an empirical basis for a first-person science of consciousness. The book confronts many of the time-tested and treasured ideas about God, evolution, the nature of reality, the nature of dying and very definition of what it means to be alive. The author’s first-hand lucid dreaming experiences demonstrate how he answered his big speculative questions: Where did the Neanderthals go? Can human consciousness experience the ultraviolet spectrum? What happened at the beginning of the universe? Can we be aware of the atoms in our own bodies? In addition, Einstein’s Gift offers controversial answers to long-standing academic questions: What is the purpose of abstract art? Why is abstract art the dominant feature of the last 100 years of art? What is the function of consciousness? What is consciousness?
Einstein’s Gift is the fruition of over 17 years of shamanistic practice and academic study, earning the author a BFA in Fine Arts from the University of Arizona and an MA in Art Theory, History and Criticism from Prescott College. He has presented his theory of consciousness at the world renowned 2006, 2008 and 2010 Tucson Consciousness Conferences. He has over 14 years of Southwestern gallery showings where he talks about and introduces people to the idea that the power of abstract art is incredibly miscalculated.
Einstein’s Gift: The Engineering of Lucid Dreams offers readers interested in art, science and consciousness a highly compelling argument and jaw dropping lucid dream experiences. The book will be 55,000 words, contain a bibliography, photographic reproductions of 7-15 paintings. The manuscript and all required copyright clearance will be completed three to six months (or sooner) upon receipt of advance. Chapters 4-8 (of 11) are undergoing a professional edit. Chapters 1-3 will be attached to your request for my nonfiction book proposal.
Einstein’s Gift: The Engineering of Lucid Dreams unifies disparate facts in three fields of study. In the field of science, empirical evidence proves that our senses do not perceive objects, rather they detect an abstraction that philosophers call raw sense data, or more accurately, abstract sense data). In the field of art, the advent of Cubist painting 1910-1912 is Braque and Picasso’s unconscious acknowledgement that the senses perceive an abstraction. This acknowledgement continues through the Movements of Modern Art and continues into Post Modern and Contemporary Art. In the forty-year-old field of consciousness studies, the fact that the senses perceive abstract sense data, lays an empirical foundation for a radically new kind of science – a first-person science of consciousness. Handling abstract sense data allows anyone who is interested the ability not only to choose the contents of their lucid dreams before hand, but also to experience themselves in two places at one time. Einstein's Gift is a must-have for lucid dreamers, artists, academics, and anyone interested in the nature of consciousness.
A first-person science of consciousness attempts to bring the spiritual back into science and is one of academia’s hottest new fields of study. Roger Penrose, Dan Lloyd, and Douglas R. Hofstadter, all contemporary academic scholars involved in attempts to establish a first-person science of consciousness, are employing narrative non-fiction as a means to explain their theories of consciousness. Unlike their books, which define and philosophize the nature of consciousness, Einstein’s Gift narrates actual first-hand experiences from the author's own engineered lucid dreams. The Engineering of Lucid Dreams eschews narrating details of the author's personal day-to-day life and instead utilizes a fictional, but academic dialogue between two characters. The first character is a college student studying abstract art (a portrayal of the author learning how to engineer lucid dreams). The second is Einstein (based on the historical Albert Einstein 1879 – 1955 whose intellectual commentary and guidance are based upon 17 years of the author’s academic and shamanic study). In the classic Aristotle vs. Socrates dialogue and debate, the young painter and Einstein argue over the existence of abstract and imaginary sense data, the nature of Postmodern Art, the Movements of Modern Art, the disappearance of the Avant-Garde and the exquisite nature of engineered lucid dreams.
The Engineering of Lucid Dreams unifies a new cognitive understanding of abstract art with the contemporary academic attempt to establish an empirical basis for a first-person science of consciousness. The book confronts many of the time-tested and treasured ideas about God, evolution, the nature of reality, the nature of dying and very definition of what it means to be alive. The author’s first-hand lucid dreaming experiences demonstrate how he answered his big speculative questions: Where did the Neanderthals go? Can human consciousness experience the ultraviolet spectrum? What happened at the beginning of the universe? Can we be aware of the atoms in our own bodies? In addition, Einstein’s Gift offers controversial answers to long-standing academic questions: What is the purpose of abstract art? Why is abstract art the dominant feature of the last 100 years of art? What is the function of consciousness? What is consciousness?
Einstein’s Gift is the fruition of over 17 years of shamanistic practice and academic study, earning the author a BFA in Fine Arts from the University of Arizona and an MA in Art Theory, History and Criticism from Prescott College. He has presented his theory of consciousness at the world renowned 2006, 2008 and 2010 Tucson Consciousness Conferences. He has over 14 years of Southwestern gallery showings where he talks about and introduces people to the idea that the power of abstract art is incredibly miscalculated.
Einstein’s Gift: The Engineering of Lucid Dreams offers readers interested in art, science and consciousness a highly compelling argument and jaw dropping lucid dream experiences. The book will be 55,000 words, contain a bibliography, photographic reproductions of 7-15 paintings. The manuscript and all required copyright clearance will be completed three to six months (or sooner) upon receipt of advance. Chapters 4-8 (of 11) are undergoing a professional edit. Chapters 1-3 will be attached to your request for my nonfiction book proposal.
Jul 26, 2010
QUERY- REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction first revision
If Genna thought returning home after a long absence would be hell, she would have brought along her hand-basket. Wanting to celebrate the good news about her fabulous job offer, Genna realizes it’s time to relinquish her past demons and go home.
Not even there five minutes, it comes back to haunt her in the form of her ex-fiancé and her unresolved feelings for him. What he did a decade ago still twists her heart and when he asks for forgiveness, Genna decides to let the past go and move on. However, when Genna’s cousin reveals long buried secrets about her ex- Genna wonders if she made a mistake. “People don’t change” Angie says, but Genna has seen it happen in more than one person since returning. Including herself.
Unexpectedly, she discovers a promising new love in the arms of a man she once despised. Her family is pushing her into this new relationship but as she wrestles with her feelings, she makes the unbelievable mistake of sleeping with her ex-. Keeping the two men from finding out about each other proves to be impossible as they both show up for a date on the same night.
Moreover, her new promotion grows cold as she faces a family member’s health crisis no one saw coming. She wonders if she should skip the advancement and remain where she never wanted to leave or go and live the life she always thought she wanted. Genna, torn between two worlds, her decision to remain is the only one possible. However, which love will capture her heart, old or new?
I am seeking representation for REMEMBERING YOU, a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Thank you everyone, in advance for your comments.
Robin
Not even there five minutes, it comes back to haunt her in the form of her ex-fiancé and her unresolved feelings for him. What he did a decade ago still twists her heart and when he asks for forgiveness, Genna decides to let the past go and move on. However, when Genna’s cousin reveals long buried secrets about her ex- Genna wonders if she made a mistake. “People don’t change” Angie says, but Genna has seen it happen in more than one person since returning. Including herself.
Unexpectedly, she discovers a promising new love in the arms of a man she once despised. Her family is pushing her into this new relationship but as she wrestles with her feelings, she makes the unbelievable mistake of sleeping with her ex-. Keeping the two men from finding out about each other proves to be impossible as they both show up for a date on the same night.
Moreover, her new promotion grows cold as she faces a family member’s health crisis no one saw coming. She wonders if she should skip the advancement and remain where she never wanted to leave or go and live the life she always thought she wanted. Genna, torn between two worlds, her decision to remain is the only one possible. However, which love will capture her heart, old or new?
I am seeking representation for REMEMBERING YOU, a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.
Thank you everyone, in advance for your comments.
Robin
Jul 24, 2010
QUERY- REINCARNATE
Click here to read the original query.
Hi,
I hope no one minds me showing back up here. I know it's been a while. My original query has proven completely ineffectual, so I'm rewriting it from the ground up. I'm hoping to get some feedback on the new version, if anyone is willing.
Dear XXX,
Jeanne Delacey doesn’t believe in God or Heaven or angels; it’s no surprise she doesn’t believe the psychic who tells her she’s the reincarnation of Jeanne d’Arc. Still, when a demon attacks her in the French Quarter, she realizes her beliefs need to bend at least a little. Sure, she might be able to shrug off nightmares of burning to death as coincidence. Ignoring the reincarnation of Pierre Cauchon, Jeanne d’Arc’s head judge and worst enemy—not so easy. Especially since he’s leading Hell’s vanguard in a war against Heaven.
The angel Jeanne finds sitting in her living room isn’t terribly Biblical, but he is a pain in the ass; he thinks she can stop the war if she stops Cauchon. She just wants her normal life back. But no matter how much she wants to run from the problem, she can’t. Because Heaven wants to bring the fight to Hell, which will land the mortal world in the crossfire. Now she must rely on a powerful bracelet that turns into a sword, and Luca Griffith—tall, dark, and definitely hiding something—for aid. Worse, she has to rely on herself. If she can’t find the courage to fight, Cauchon will send her to the stake again. And this time, the entire world will burn with her.
REINCARNATE is an 82,000 word adult urban fantasy set in modern day New Orleans.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
July 24, 2010 5:36 PM
Hi,
I hope no one minds me showing back up here. I know it's been a while. My original query has proven completely ineffectual, so I'm rewriting it from the ground up. I'm hoping to get some feedback on the new version, if anyone is willing.
Dear XXX,
Jeanne Delacey doesn’t believe in God or Heaven or angels; it’s no surprise she doesn’t believe the psychic who tells her she’s the reincarnation of Jeanne d’Arc. Still, when a demon attacks her in the French Quarter, she realizes her beliefs need to bend at least a little. Sure, she might be able to shrug off nightmares of burning to death as coincidence. Ignoring the reincarnation of Pierre Cauchon, Jeanne d’Arc’s head judge and worst enemy—not so easy. Especially since he’s leading Hell’s vanguard in a war against Heaven.
The angel Jeanne finds sitting in her living room isn’t terribly Biblical, but he is a pain in the ass; he thinks she can stop the war if she stops Cauchon. She just wants her normal life back. But no matter how much she wants to run from the problem, she can’t. Because Heaven wants to bring the fight to Hell, which will land the mortal world in the crossfire. Now she must rely on a powerful bracelet that turns into a sword, and Luca Griffith—tall, dark, and definitely hiding something—for aid. Worse, she has to rely on herself. If she can’t find the courage to fight, Cauchon will send her to the stake again. And this time, the entire world will burn with her.
REINCARNATE is an 82,000 word adult urban fantasy set in modern day New Orleans.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
July 24, 2010 5:36 PM
Jul 23, 2010
Query- Fledgling (Revised)
Click here to read the original query.
This is my revised version- I hope it reads better. Thank you for your feedback.
Fledgling, is a completed 90,000 word, young adult urban fantasy.
Eighteen-year-old Chance Morgan has a secret—but he’s not the only one.
Chance has everything he could want. With his Navajo grandfather as a guide, he successfully hides his growing ancestral powers as the concealed world of shapeshifting unfolds before him. He discovers his abilities are far more intoxicating than wasting time with small town friends, having no interest in complicating his life any further. But when Ana Hughes, the new girl at Clark Fork High, tries going undetected, he can’t help but notice her… even if he doesn’t want to.
Quiet and introspective, Ana’s sad green eyes pull Chance in, shattering his preconceived rules against love and friendship. The opaque scar rising up her sternum and an irregular heartbeat trigger his instinct to protect her and he knows she’s hiding something. But as their trust grows, Ana also becomes suspicious of his animal-like senses and miraculous healing ability. And he is forced to risk either losing her or revealing his astonishing secret life.
On graduation night his grandfather reluctantly exposes a gruesome family secret. Then a nameless cousin appears who unravels a world Chance thought he understood-- placing all of their lives in jeopardy.
As a mother of a child with heart defects, I have lived through the stress and fear associated with it and was inspired to create a character who could rise above her physical disabilities.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
This is my revised version- I hope it reads better. Thank you for your feedback.
Fledgling, is a completed 90,000 word, young adult urban fantasy.
Eighteen-year-old Chance Morgan has a secret—but he’s not the only one.
Chance has everything he could want. With his Navajo grandfather as a guide, he successfully hides his growing ancestral powers as the concealed world of shapeshifting unfolds before him. He discovers his abilities are far more intoxicating than wasting time with small town friends, having no interest in complicating his life any further. But when Ana Hughes, the new girl at Clark Fork High, tries going undetected, he can’t help but notice her… even if he doesn’t want to.
Quiet and introspective, Ana’s sad green eyes pull Chance in, shattering his preconceived rules against love and friendship. The opaque scar rising up her sternum and an irregular heartbeat trigger his instinct to protect her and he knows she’s hiding something. But as their trust grows, Ana also becomes suspicious of his animal-like senses and miraculous healing ability. And he is forced to risk either losing her or revealing his astonishing secret life.
On graduation night his grandfather reluctantly exposes a gruesome family secret. Then a nameless cousin appears who unravels a world Chance thought he understood-- placing all of their lives in jeopardy.
As a mother of a child with heart defects, I have lived through the stress and fear associated with it and was inspired to create a character who could rise above her physical disabilities.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
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