Apr 26, 2010

Query- THE DRIFTER

Dear Agent,

For sixteen-year-old Pip, knowing everyone’s time of death is growing tiresome. Especially when she can’t stop it. However When a boy named Romeo hits her with his motorcycle she suddenly loses her curse.

Her past a blur and her curse gone, Pip finally sees how it is to be normal and to fall in love. But when Romeo’s father discovers she is a drifter, she is forced to run, Romeo by her side after his father’s last warning. Yet Pip’s recurring hallucinations of the dead keep coming and she is desperate to tell Romeo of her lost curse. Except he would never believe her. Until the night they plan their escape, her curse returns...and Romeo has only one hour left to live.

I’m seeking representation for THE DRIFTER, a 55,000-word paranormal romance novel for young adults. Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

A.K.

Query- The History of the Tie Dye Bra and Other Lessons in Me (Revised)

Click here to read the original query.

Dear Agent:

Jaclyn Witt is going to live the rest of her life with the man of her dreams. If only he’d ask her out and her karma would cooperate. The History of the Tie Dye Bra and Other Lessons in Me chronicles the coming-of-age of quirky heroine Jackie Witt, who navigates adolescence with off-beat humor and three unlikely best friends.

There is a reason that Chelsea’s mom nicknamed Jackie, Chelsea, Frankie and Joe
“a strange little family.” They are inseparable, committed to each other despite their differences. Their friendship provides something each of them craves.

For Jackie, it’s an appreciation of her unique outlook on life, from her obsession with game shows, to her infamous drunk dancing episodes, and even for her quest to find the perfect man through an ever-growing list of boyfriend rules. For Frankie, it means protection from the hippie parents who see her love of beef and opposition to marijuana use as a sign of their failure. For Chelsea, it’s an understanding of the vulnerability behind the flirt who declares premarital sex as her college major to finagle free drinks in bars. But what about Joe? Is it about getting attention that was missing in a household focused on his brother’s drug addiction? Or is there something more to Joe’s dedication to his strange little family?

The story takes us from childhood exploits to the end of college, where Jackie finally meets her soul mate. When her friends’ meddling jeopardizes their budding romance, Jackie makes a decision that threatens to destroy her strange little family. So, will the funny foursome go their separate ways, or prevail to protect each other’s frailties and friendship?

I am seeking representation for my first novel, a 50,000-word, humorous YA romance that uses Rachel’s witty narrative to tear at the heart and mend the soul. I read that you were an agent with an interest in YA and romance novels who welcomes first-time authors with a unique voice and humorous perspective, which would make you the perfect fit for this book.

Thank you for taking the time to consider representing my work. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,
LL

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Thanks to all the great comments I got yesterday, I was able to improve my query. Here's revision #1. Any thoughts?
PS Thanks everyone and especially Rick Daley for this great site!