Jan 10, 2011

Query - The Discovery of Lumina (revised, formerly The Paw Shake Portal)

Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.

Dear (Agent):

In the month of March, eleven-year-old Alex Locklin makes three significant discoveries. First, he learns that his family is moving in June. Then he realizes he’s growing apart from his two best friends. But his greatest discovery is a secret: the stray cat in his back yard and the new girl in his neighborhood are the same being.

Lumina reveals her half-cat, half-human identity to Alex in hopes that he can help her. She is a member of the royal cat family, and they are being threatened by an enemy army of cats called Alley Scratch. In order to gain the strength and endurance she needs to fight them, Lumina has to form a “bond of trust” with a human. The more their friendship grows, the stronger she will become.

Alex eagerly volunteers to form this bond, and as a result, he’s swept into the affairs of the far away Animal World. He helps Lumina investigate her sister’s suspicious boyfriend and attempts to make peace with aggressive animals. But the clock is ticking. Moving day is imminent, and so are Alley Scratch’s attacks on Lumina’s family. Although Lumina is energized by the bond, Alex refuses to stand idle. He will stop at nothing to protect his new friends… even if their days together are numbered.

THE DISCOVERY OF LUMINA is a middle grade novel complete at 30,000 words. (Reason for querying specific agent here.)

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,



(Author's note: I posted previous queries for the same book under its old title, The Paw Shake Portal. I realized that my last query didn't accurately reflect the most important points of my book, so this is a new angle on the same story. Any suggestions are appreciated!)