Aug 4, 2010

REMEMBERING YOU -- women's fiction third revison (and hopefully the last?)

Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.
Click here to read the second revision.

Returning home to Bristol, Rhode Island for the annual Fourth of July parade for the first time in ten years, Genna is excited to share the great news about her fantastic promotion (a goal she’s been working toward all her life) as executive kitchen manager of a swanky Delaware country club. She isn’t home five minutes before trouble starts when she sees Tony, her ex-fiancĂ©, at her uncle’s diner. Although everyone says he’s no good, Genna can’t see through her memories clearly enough to discern if they’re right.

Problems escalate as Genna discovers her aunt may have Alzheimer’s and no one in the family wants to deal with it; one cousin is hysterical, another completely shuts down, and in the midst of all this, her beloved uncle has a heart attack.

Genna finds keeping her uncle’s diner open during the busiest time of the year is more than just hard work, it has always been in her blood and she questions if she should give up her fantastic new job offer to stay in Bristol and take care of her family and the diner.

Tony is also pushing her to stay but when little Petie DiCampo appears, all grown up and looking like a calendar boy, she wonders if he could be the man to finally get her over Tony. But Tony isn’t giving up that easily.

Genna figures out all the answers to her family’s problems before she goes back to Delaware. She also decides living without love is not in her future, the problem is; which man will she choose?

REMEMBERING YOU is a completed work of women’s fiction at 87,000 words.

Query - Hidden in Shadows

I would love for you to consider HIDDEN IN SHADOWS, a 96,000-word urban fantasy romance novel.

Lorna McCloud is an assassin hell bent on avenging her father's murder only she has no leads. Soon she has more important issues to deal with than whether to use a dagger or a gun to kill her next target.

First, she's captured by the Paranormal Intelligence Agency, a shady, clandestine organization. A PIA henchman tells Lorna that she has the ability to create and hide in artificial shadows, a power she had unknowingly used during her nightly killings. Lorna distrusts the agency, and manages to escape.

Then Lorna heads to a small island where many of her potential clients want the king dead. Lorna hasn't felt the stirrings of love in a long time, but something about the noble Alaric makes her long for the light after her lifetime spent in shadow.

Torn between murder and love, Lorna has never been able to escape her past or her ardent desire for revenge, and now they may prevent her from her only chance of living a normal, happy life.

I am the author of a medieval fantasy romance series, The Kingdom of Arnhem – Woman of Honor (2009) and Knight of Glory (2010) published with Desert Breeze Publishing. I have also sold six short stories for anthologies, two of which are under the pen name Nicolette Zamora.

Thank you so much for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.

Query- Emma's Heaven - Women's Fiction

There’s only one thing Megan wants: to find her missing daughter. Then when she does, no one believes her.

When her two-year old daughter walked out of their front door and disappeared in the space of two minutes, Megan’s world crumbled. In the two years since, there have been tons of sightings – all by Megan herself. But no one believes her. After all, why should they? Not once was the child she saw her daughter. Her husband, her counselor, her own mother and even Megan herself, fear she’s delusional. But then, at the local town fair, Megan sees her. Holding hands and laughing with an elderly couple. Her daughter, Emma. Megan can’t reach them, and the only trace she’s left with is a photo she managers to snap before they vanish. The police feel she’s cried wolf too many times.

Unable to handle the constant heartache of all the false sightings, Megan’s husband threatens to walk away from their marriage. But Megan isn’t willing to give up. Armed with only a photo and mother instinct, Megan risks her marriage and sanity to pursue the girl in the photograph. As she pieces together the disorienting trail, Megan begins to question whether she's closing in on the people who took her child, or if she's giving up everything to chase an illusion.

Thanks everyone for your help.

Query- The Hunted of 2060 (revised)

Click here to read the original query.

HERE IS A RE_WRITE THANKS TO COMMENTS. Please let me know if I am any closer:)


The Hunted of 2060
Paranormal ChickLit with a side of SciFi
85,000 words


America 2060. Three Lovers. Two Species. One Way to Survive.

An original, dark paranormal chick-lit with a side of sci-fi. Nineteen year old April discovers the secrets within herself are the very secrets that are being hunted by a group dubbed the Rogue Militia. As April uncovers that she is a mixed of human and alien DNA, she finds herself on a dangerous path of self-discovery, belonging to a hybrid species on the verge of extinction.

At University, Robert, the love of her life, is put at risk as she struggles with who she was and who she is becoming, while a hybrid family she never knew existed enters her life, a hybrid male pursues her, and her existence becomes a cat and mouse game with enemies she will have to outrun, outfight or outwit to survive. Under General Raul, the military has no mercy for a foreign species that invaded earth in 2020 and when April realizes the General has secrets of his own, which have robbed her of her birth mother, grandfather and involve stolen hybrid DNA, she knows she must save more than herself or the world will fall into the hands of a madman.

With underlining themes of how prejudice breaks human connections and a theme of wildlife conservation, April speaks to the core of what makes us human. Fans of Gena Showater's 'Teen Alien Huntress', and Maggie Steifvarter's 'Shiver', as well as fans of the movie 'Cursed' starring Josh Jackson, and fans of Keri Arthur's Riley Jenson series will enjoy this Hunted of 2060 series.