Jun 29, 2010


Click here to read the original query.
Click here to read the first revision.

HERE IS THE DRAFT QUERY OF A ROSE AND AN AMARANTH. Thank you for your comments they were really helpful and showed me things I never realised. Oh sorry for that, there are paragraphs I seemed to have forgotten. I have realized the bad thing on commenting on other books, thank you for that insight.
I hope this now ‘shows’ rather than telling.

Dear Agent,

A Rose and an Amaranth is an 115,000 word Young Adult complete manuscript and a first in a planned series with the sequels in outline. It is about a vampire who finds himself unworthy of a human girl to the extent of wanting to be human for her yet he does not realize her yearn to be like him.

Rosario Vinros is a hopeful girl waiting for the “climax” of her life to arrive. She is alive because she does not have the courage to commit suicide, but who said suicide is one way to die, there is however chancing on a hauntingly intoxicating vampire that she can provoke to get 'The Kiss' from. The problem is Daniel Heath Forsyth is damningly obsessed with finding his father, underlying is the stake at which Rosario's life lies for he chooses her out of the girls in the Catholic school to be his company, and no one seems to understand why. His plans get ruined when he realizes that he has fallen for the girl. He finds it possible to turn in to a human owing to a virus circulating in his world, and he feels he will now become worthy of her if he allows the virus to infect him, but three vampires have already died of it and he runs a high risk of dying too. Though everyone is going back for vaccination he chooses to risk everything.

Sadly, Rosario and his family come to learn that she is a latent vampire and is linked to someone she is obliged to marry and in their world infidelity is not taken lightly. She and Daniel part ways, and as she waits for her awakening to be triggered by this person she is to meet, she wonders what may come of her life and through this road she learns about the values of family and love and fighting for what you want.
Thank you for your time and consideration, I will be happy to send you my manuscript at your request. I hope to hear from you soon.


Query - Back to Me

Dear Agent,

Jake Bailey is Kate Dalton’s boomerang love, the person from the famous Richard Bach quote who comes back when you set them free. Unfortunately for Kate, good ole Richard never said anything about what it meant when this scenario happened over and over again.

No matter how many times Kate let Jake fly free into the world, he always came back when she least expected it. She’d try to move on with someone new only to come home from a wonderful date to find Jake on her doorstep. One look at those twinkling green eyes and that boyish grin and she couldn’t help but remember she loved him.

Now it’s been eight years since they first met and Kate finds herself faced with the realization that Jake won’t be coming back this time. As she reflects on their time together, she’s torn between the empty ache in her chest and the chance to start fresh with someone new. Can Kate learn how to say goodbye to someone she’s not certain she can live without?

"Back to Me" is a completed 80,000 word women’s fiction manuscript.

I am a [occupation] and soon-to-be published author. My nonfiction book [Title Redacted] is due out with [Publishing Company] in early 2011. I also write for [well-known publication] in their [name of section], and have been published by a leading journal, an online magazine and a number of news outlets and blogs for my work on [certain topics]. I make regular television appearances with [regional television network] and blog on their website. Though none of these experiences directly relates to writing fiction, all of them have given me opportunities to grow as a writer and have prepared me for the editing process.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours truly,

[Hopeful Fiction Author]


Dear [Agent],

Lynette’s never benefitted from constantly breaking the rules set down by the strict religious Continent of Arydnea- until she eavesdrops on a conversation regarding a plot to murder her family. It may be too late for her father, but she grabs her sister, a sword, and a box she can’t open, and steals away in the night to escape the same fate.

But Lynette can’t keep running forever. As the female descendant of a hero of the Goddess, Lynette must take up the hero’s mantle. Never mind she’s thirteen. Never mind she doesn’t know how to swing a sword. Never mind the murderer is the king’s best friend, or he’s got the royal army with him. And never mind he has six hundred years of experience, because Lynette’s going to up the playing field.

If the Goddess expects miracles from Lynette, then the feeling’s mutual.

LYNETTE WALKER: THE RAIN LEGACY is a 40,000 word middle grade fantasy novel. Thank you for your time and consideration.

[My name]